My jokes

I could tell my cousin you are so annoying, but she told me first, so we both said it at the same time. 🫣🤣😂

Wow! The jokes on here are so dark they pick my cotton!

Me: Hey! Look at my drawing of deez!

My babysitter: Very nice! But, uh, what’s deez?

Me: (¬‿¬)

Me: Hey, were you born on a highway?

My enemy: Uh, no, why?

Me: Because that’s where most accidents happen.

I told my emo girlfriend, "Do you like the lights?" Oh wait, she ain't got any.

Every time my cousin and I, we settle it out with our game, so we play rock paper scissors. 😂🤣🤣

Mate, my wife Susan has kicked me out again, anyone got a lift?

Roblox jokes be like: hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm I should create a game.

*Creates game* bruh my game got to thousand hundred 700,000 likes!

😄😄😄

The neighbor’s children challenged me to a water fight.

I’m just checking my Facebook quickly before the kettle boils.

My middle name is Brian. I was so proud of being able to spell my full name till someone pointed out "Johnny Brain Walker" was incorrect.

My boss found my permanent record at the orphanage, and he’s mad. I got fired...

I have said a ton of jokes in my lifetime.

But I got fired from that job.

Spell "Peppa." Okay. P. E. P. P. A. Hahaha! You said peepee.

I tried this with my sister Makenna because she loves Peppa Pig and has a backpack of it. So I told her to spell her backpack's letters and tricked her... And she is only four years old and my secret is I am only eight years old.

My girlfriend broke up with me because I quote Linkin Park too much.

But in the end, it doesn’t even matter.

Some kid: Hey, did you know there's an orphanage down the street?!

Me: NO WAY! Wanna check it out?

Kid: NO, IT'S HAUNTED!!

Me: Haunted my ass, let's go!

Kid: Wait, isn't your house also haunted???

Me: Yea

Some weird kid came into school today with his tagging gun. He tagged my friend really good. At the end, he tagged 12 students and 1 teacher. VICTORY ROAYAL ✌

RYAN MY BELOVED SON WHERE ARE YOU?

I was at school today, and one of my friends said after a test, "Man, that was hard." After that, I started laughing and I said, "That's what she said."

My teacher said, "Words don't hurt!"

So I threw my dictionary at her.

My jokes are like your dad, you only see them for a few days.