I gave my friend some paper. It cut his wrists.
My Jokes
P.S. My brother made this up when he had no meds... I almost died.
What does ATM stand for?
Answer: Amy’s Terrible Mom.
😂🤣
Guys, you shouldn't joke about 9/11.
My great-uncle died that day. Best damn pilot in Iraq.
An Asian student was learning logarithm in class. He wrote down his name after the question. The teacher asked why. He replied, "My class ID is number 1."
My sister said that I need to stop with the audited butt:
I got it from her when I was born.
So my depressed friend wanted to high-five the tree by the cemetery.
The tree left him hanging though.
"You have to do this," and my sister said, "Well, I don't care."
And I said, "Well, you care enough to respond back, oh my gosh!"
My great grandpa killed Hitler.
"Knock, knock.""Who's there?""Not your dad."Random kid: "My dad went to get milk. My mom said he will be back soon."
🎵Penaldo Thrills🎵
C’mon c’mon turn the VAR on.
It's Penalty time and it won't be long.
Gotta dive and cry some more.
It's Penalty time and it won't be long.
‘Til I Hit the floor and dive alot.
Cry some more and dive alot. That all I need, because I got u my love, Penalty.
What do Myspace and my dad have in common?
I haven't seen them in a while.
I visited my new friend in his apartment. He told me to make myself at home.
So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.
I am in trouble. My mum asked me to get six cans of Sprite.
But I got seven Up.
So, as a school shooter, I try to remember my ABC's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN!
And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speak to me about the rest.
My dad went for the milk, but he left his wheelchair.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa, not screaming in terror like all the passengers on the plane he was flying.
Your forehead is so big you can headbutt my face and chest at the same time.
We shouldn't joke about major tragedies. My dad died in 9/11, he was Saudi Arabia's best pilot.
My sister 🤣😂
I told my husband he should embrace his mistakes.
He hugged me!
