What do Gay Men and Minorities have in common?
My dad hates them both!
My Jokes
I wish my ex-wife would take me back. :(
I hate when my father doesn't cook me cocktails for tea.
After long consideration, I've decided to get a zebra tattoo on my wrist. Not like anyone will notice the difference.
Guys stop before I tell my parents!
Q: What is the worst thing to hear your surgeon say?
A: Oops, I dropped my lollipop!
My mom bought me a car, and she called me an ungrateful b*tch because I sat in my wheelchair the whole time.
I'm always forgetting these kinds of jokes. I also forgot my son's name.
I rate my dad as a pilot 9 out of 11.
Kid 1: Guys, stop making 9/11 jokes. My dad died in 9/11.
Kid 2: Sorry, I didn't know.
Kid 1: He was the best fighter pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.
What do you call two men fucking? My dad and I. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I'm afraid for my gay calendar. Its days are numbered!
Leave a like if you LOL at this joke!
When you're so rich that you can buy anything, you end up getting a cow in your living room. Yeah, anyways, my ex is still in my living room.
I asked my dad, "Are we there yet?" and he told me, "Don't worry, son, it will be a short ride!"
The biggest inconvenience in 2001, I thought, was my brother. Turns out it was 9/11. I guess the planes saw him be born and died from how ugly he was. Aluh aluckbar.
I found an alien in my backyard. I put him to work. He went to a farm, and I never saw him again. Moments later, he is on the Daily Planet acting as a reporter. A green rock smashed my house. I called him back, and he passed out.
I remarked, "You lazy!"
Last week I felt so high and mighty I thought I could fly. I took one shot, puffed through my pipe, and jumped in the air on a trampoline. I woke up in heaven.
I asked an angel, "How did I die?"
"Well, little monkey, you thought your bed was a trampoline and you hit your head. Your mom called the doctor, and the doctor said you were dead."
I told my friend you should definitely quit smoking, but he could not find me because he was already up in flames.
My friend said he wanted to die, and I told him not to jump. But when he screamed, "Hi, I'm Johnny Knoxville, and welcome to Jackass!" I knew it was over.
So my ex, who wouldn't leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though Will has a better haircut than me, but anyway, when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met, and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat.
Then I told her she has the Wendy's logo haircut and then some other things I'm not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit, I was done.
Anyways, she cried lol.
