Music jokes
It isn't rap music if it isn't about rape.
What don't Rick Astley and the Twin Towers have in common?
One won't let you down, while the other will.
Ice cream truck drivers are the most sus people on earth. They’re adults who play children’s music and give ice cream to kids who approach their van.
What's the depressed person's favorite song?
Van Halen - Jump
A horse, a fox, and a bunny join together and make a rock band. They started doing tiny gigs, but they got famous and went on tour. They all got so famous it went to their heads, and the band disbanded. The fox made his, and the bunny made her own. The horse was sad that the band was no more, so he went to a bar, and the bartender asked why the long face?
What is love? Baby, don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more!
Why were the rappers late for their flight?
They forgot to pack.
How do you know if a rapper is lying?
His rhymes don't add up.
What do you call two Hispanics with Parkinson's disease?
Maracas.
Beatles
Are cool.
Derrick and Clive. They have a song about a Dad with cancer and other extremely offensive subjects in a routine called "The Non-Stop Dancer." It is very funny, but it is made even funnier by Dudley Moore's drunken and stoned laughter through the song.
One of the best routines ever. Look it up on YouTube. They recorded them in the studio, but they are ad-libbing and extremely drunk.
How does a rapper fix stuff?
With a RAP-AIR!
How do you wake up Lady Gaga?
You Poker Face.
What is the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can't tuna fish.
Why did the guitarist go to prison?
'Cause he fingered A minor.
What’s the definition of “perfect pitch?”
Throwing a viola into the dumpster without hitting the rim.
What is Meat Loaf's new name now that he has passed?
Ground beef.
Someone fucked a member of BTS.
Where does a pianist go on vacation? The Florida Keys.
I have a pen, I have an Apple, um, Apple pen.
The Taliban had a plane, the US had a building boom, 9/11.