Movie jokes

What actor does an orphan hate?

Vin Diesel.

Your forehead is so big that it said, "To be continued."

What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.

Exercise?

I thought you said "extra fries!"

-A minion (you may now laugh).

A baby penguin sat on an iceberg. The baby penguin watched the Titanic sink.

Do you ever wonder why Michael from Halloween likes his mask so much? It's because he ad-Myers it.

Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson has made a laudable, command decision to omit real firearms from his movie sets.

This being the case, he ought to produce, direct, and star in his next movie titled: “The Rubber Gun Squad!” 👌 😉

Chris Rock: Jada, I can't wait to see you in G.I. Jane 2!

Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song starts playing:

Will: "I got in one lil' fight about my wife's lost hair, she said, 'Will, if you don't do something I'm gonna have an affair!'" 😂😂😂

Why could not the 11 year old watch the pirate movie?

because it was rated RRRRGGGG.

I am guessing you don't understand :(

Edward Scissorhands: Why is it that every time I touch someone, they get offended?

Kids: Because you're a psycho path.

An action hero stops a man running by throwing a tire at him.

What is his one liner? "I told you to stop running or you will get tired."

What is a mouse's favorite movie?

"Sharpay's Fabu-mouse Adventure!"

Dating 101:

Here's what you do:

1. Dinner. 2. Kiss. 3. Movie. 4. Sex. 5. Bring her back home. 6. Get paid 15 bucks for babysitting.

Your hairline design was used as the Batman logo!

Why did Paul Walker regret turning in his test?

Because his grade went from 99 to 0 in less than a second.

If James Bond is the most famous spy, wouldn't that also make him the worst spy?

What do you call a Mexican fighting a Catholic priest?

Alien vs. Predator.

What's the difference between a priest and Woody from Toy Story?

Woody goes limp when a kid walks in the room.

Your hairline sucks; even Harry Potter could not put it under a spell to turn it back to order.

What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can’t be found.