Movie jokes
Your forehead's so big, it's built like Megamind's robot, period.
They are making a movie about clocks.
It’s about time.
How do you know cat's don't always land on their feet?
Mufasa.
Sex dolls are alive in the Toy Story universe.
Kid with Cancer: "When I get older, I want to be a movie star or a singer."
Nurse: *Laughs*
Kid: "Why are you laughing?"
Nurse: "When I get OLDER."
Proceeds to laugh.
Why do oompa loompas secretly take Skinny Dips in Willy Wonka's chocolate?
They wanted some chocolate balls.
What is an orphan's favorite movie? Hint, not Home Alone. It's actually Batman, 'cause they are 50% the same as him.
What did Dom Toretto say about the tree Paul Walker hit?
"Family strong, but not that strong."
Yo mama so fat, she is one of the boulders in Indiana Jones.
I am never letting Elsa take care of my dog again. Last time she just let it go.
What’s an orphan’s favorite movie character?
Harry Potter.
what did Bruce Willis say after he had a vasectomy? "snip-y ki yay motherfucker"
I’d like to take you to the movies, but unfortunately, they don’t let you bring your own snacks.
New horror movie idea.
The main character loves anime. The killer yells "Omae wa mou shindeiru." The main character instinctively yells back "NANI???" and is killed.
Literally every movie:
"I love you." "I love you, too."
My life:
My 'friends': "Hey, Hailey likes you!" Him: "Wtf, I have a girlfriend, sorry not sorry." His friends: Spreads the word throughout the whole goddamn country. 😶
Who is not allowed to watch PG movies?
Orphans.
The couple next door made a porn film.
They don’t know it yet.
Why did the Star Wars movies come out 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3?
Yoda was in charge of scheduling.
Things we all do:
Call the Royal blue tang fish the "Dory fish," and the Clownfish "Nemo fish"! 🤣
I do this too often!
Edward Scissorhands: Why is it that every time I touch someone, they get offended?
Kids: Because you're a psycho path.