My son said that bully needs a pounding then i say Yeah right that is what i said and did to your mother.My son opens his mouth and freezes i guess he knew what i was talking about.


Unknown 1one

Ooh!I know a joke!<–(papyrus) What is it?<—(Sans) Knock Knoock!<—(Papyrus) Uh…who’s there?..<—(Sans) Sans<—(Papyrus) Sans who?<—(Sans) SANS IS LAZY!!!NOW PICK UP YOUR SOCKS BEFORE I SHOVE MY SPAGHETTI INTO YOUR MOUTH!<—(Papyrus)



“Jonny jonny” “yes papa” “eating sugar” no papa” “OPEN UR MOUTH!!” Shoves hand down throat-



poop+mouth= yummy for dung Beatles and HEDGEHOGS



why was the toilet angry? because everyone was pooping in his mouth :>



Christopher and Tony were tempted for a beer but they only had 2 dollars each. Christopher got an idea and run away to the butcher and see if he got something good. He came back with a sausage. So they went to a pub and ordered 2 beers and 2 whiskeys.

  • Are you crazy?! Said Tony to Christopher. ‘We don’t have any money!’
  • Take it easy now, said Christopher. 'I have a plan.' When they finnished drink everything up christopher put the sausage through his own zipper and begged Tony to bend on his knees and take the sausage with his mouth. The bartender saw what they did and throw them out without even paying. So Christopher and Tony kept doing the same thing pub after pub after pub. After the 10th pub said Tony: I can’t do this anymore. I am drunk and my knees are in too much pain to even handle the walk.
  • How do you think i feel? Said Christopher exhausted. ’ I dropped the sausage in the 3th pub!’


Marlon Louis

How do you get a baby to stop crying?

Simple… you staple it’s mouth shut.



How do we GET a butt:god made us like that and we can’t change it if you wanted to you have to die <:



One day, inexplicably, my talking parrot started insulting me. He called me an idiot, a fool, a jerk, stupid, and a variety of other nasty names. I warned the squawker to cease, but to no avian avail. Fed up, I finally flipped the foul-mouthed feather-brain into the freezer…but after about 15 seconds, I relented and let him out. “I’m so sorry,” he declared! “I don’t know what came over me, and realize I shouldn’t have said those terrible things. I hope you can forgive me, and I promise never to do it again! By the way…what did the chicken do?” 🐔😂



A man was asked by his 21 years old daughter, " Dad how do you give a blowjob to a man that has a big “dick”? her father replied " honey, you should have watch me last night - it was inside my mouth, does it cycle now?"



Do you like Wendy’s? Yeah Wendy’s nuts finna go in your mouth



Why do feminists eat so much pussy? to get the taste of dick out of their mouths does it cycle now you stupid bitches



How do you stop a heterosexual woman from sucking your dick? piss inside her mouth



Fat people are thristy so I piss in their mouth



There was once a kid named Timmy. His father & mother went to bed one night and didn’t hear or see Timmy come with them. They all get under the covers Timmy, still unnoticed, looks under the covers and lets out a blood curdling scream. “MOMMY WATCH OUT THERE IS A SNAKE GOING INTO YOUR BIG BLACK HAIRY BUSH!” And he proceeds to say, “DON’T WORRY MOMMY I’LL GET IT!” And he takes his fathers penis in his mouth and chomps down. Now I want you to think what their breakfast conversation was the next morning.



Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick Jill’s candy but Jack got a shock and a mouth full of cock ‘cause Jill’s real name is Randy. Yes, this joke is stolen.



What did the fish say to the other fish when it got hooked? That’s what you get for not keeping your mouth shut.


There is a party in my mouth and your dick is invited



so joe was at the store and he was looking for a dildo then he saw one made out of dick skin so he grabbed it and uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh UhuhUhUhUhUhuHuHuHuHUHUHUHUHUHUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH went his mouth PENIS PENIS


Daniel King

Why do horses 🐴 eat with their mouth open?

Because they have bad stable manners.