Mortality jokes
Chuck Norris is so immortal, even he killed Death.
A good bath is like a dead lover.
You can enjoy them, that is until they get too cold.
Yo people!
Little Johnny's actually dead!
Why do you put a baby in a blender feet first?
So you can watch the expression on their face.
"Where exactly are you taking me, doctor?"
"To the morgue."
"What? But I’m not dead yet!"
"And we’re not there yet."
These jokes are nearly as dead as Steven Hawkings.
What do you call a dead human?
A DEAD HUMAN! HAHAHahahah ha.. ha.. ha Am I the only one laughing?
Did you hear about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.
Why do dead babies cry? Just kidding, they are dead.
While I was out shopping, I tripped in a store and a lady would not stop staring at me. For fun, I said, "Sorry! It's been a while since I've possessed a body." She looked horrified.
Dads are like boomerangs... I hope!
Son: Dad, why is my name Experience? Dad: Son, Experience is the name we give our mistakes.
You won't eat a human, so why eat meat? Bold of you to presume I won't eat a person.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.
What's so great about dead baby jokes? They never get old.
I keep hearing "Obesity kills."
My only question is "Why is it taking so long?"
God: “Steven, join us.”
Sees the staircase to Heaven.
Steven: “Ahh, fu-”
What is common with dark humor and unvaccinated kids?
Neither do ever grow old.
New study reveals that women slightly overweight live longer... than the men who mention it.
What does a bicycle and Jade Goody have in common?
They can't reach 30.
There is a thin line between death and life!
You won't live to see it.....
The Cardiogram will!!
What does dark humor and a child with cancer have in common?
That I will never get old.
What is the best part of twenty-one year olds?
There's twenty of them.
You know every time we think of sex, an angel dies.
We ran out of dead people hundreds of years ago.