Morbid jokes

Morbid jokes

Rape

    • Rape, 9/11, abortion, orphan, murder, dead, kill, drugs.

    What makes all these categories so familiar? Either you've experienced them, or made them up in your backstory.

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    • Priest

    • What happens when you throw an underage boy between two Catholic priests?

    They fight and... You know the rest.

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    • Blood

    • I donated blood today. In the future, I will try to remember that I'm supposed to donate my blood only.

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    • Woman

    • What’s the difference between women and condoms?

    There isn’t a difference; they’re both throw aways.

  • 4

    • Name

    • A father is talking to his three kids.

    Kid 1: Why is my name Rose?

    Dad: Because when you were a kid, a rose fell on your head.

    Kid 2: Why is my name Lily?

    Dad: Because a lily fell on your head when you were a baby.

    Kid 3: Auughhghhhggghhh!

    Dad: Oh hey, Brick.

  • 2

    • Name

    • If you have a daughter, give her the same name as the mum; that way when you call for a beer, you get two beers, and when you call for sex, you get two sex...

  • 3

    • Brain Damage

    • Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone chucked a brick at her.

    Why did Sally throw a clock out the window? She had brain damage from the brick.

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    • Orphan

    • Why can't orphans see all these jokes on this website that we're posting?

    'Cause they don't know where the home page is.

    Men

    • Look at a bag of black grapes. See how dark they are? That’s how I like my men. 25 at a time.

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