Morbid jokes
Slavery has existed in the western world for 3 centuries, but in the Arab regions it has existed before and is still going on, so why don’t people talk about it?
Because it’s only bad when white people do it.
I hope death is a woman That way she'll never look at me twice
So anyway, this old guy goes to the doctors. The doctor says, "It's bad news, you've got cancer and Alzheimer's." The old guy replies, "At least I've not got cancer!"
What's black and white?
History.
Dark humor is like food.
Not everyone gets it.
Same old boring ass day, until a person with Parkinson's fainted and got everyone's attention.
He really shook things up today.
What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.
What's all fuzzy, warm, and laughing? The person who snapped its neck and put it into the blender.
Today was no fun. A rhino escaped from the zoo and ate two parents, and I lost my job as zookeeper.
What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
Wanna hear a joke? My life! Hahahah! Just kidding, jokes actually mean something...
What did the North tower say to the south tower? "Sorry, can't talk, got to catch a plane."
What did the Hiroshima survivor say about the day Little Boy dropped? "It was a blast!"
What does the Bible stand for?
Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.
Your reflection.
My girlfriend lives a few miles away from me.
The other night, she called me at around 3 AM. She was terrified. She said that there were two armed gunmen in her apartment.
With all that adrenaline going through my system, it made it hard to go back to sleep.
Why did Susie get cut from the soccer team? She has no legs!
Who broke into my house by kicking down my door? Not Susie... But she still is in my basement, since she can't run!
What do apples and witches have in common? They both hang on trees.
Why couldn’t the toilet paper make it across the road?
It got stuck in a crack.
One day, two friends found a treasure map. So they decided to try to find the treasure.
After several hours they found the treasure. It was a suit that gives the person wearing it super strength. One of the friends wore the suit and hugged the other friend. They were both red.
What's a pedophile's favorite holiday?
Halloween. Free delivery!