What’s the difference between a zit and a catholic priest?
A zit waits till you’re 13 to come on your face
"My grandmother used to tell us a joke. She’d say 'Knock knock,' we’d say 'Who’s there?.' Then she’d say 'I can’t remember'... and start to cry."
What does a rock and a girl have in common? The flat ones get skipped
I threw a paralyzed kid into the fireplace and called him hotwheels.
What does a phone and a grandma have in common? They both die. What's the difference between them? If you shove something up your grandma's ass, she won't come back to life.
whats sad and has no life .the person reding this
Are You a Samsung Galaxy Note 7? Because, I want to explode in You!
I came across a dead body in the woods. I liked it so much I came again.
My Smoothie Ingredients -Bananas -Strawberry -The Blood of my ex -Peanut Butter
How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thin you slice them-hope marie lawson
Why is reverse cowgirl banned in Alabama? Because you should never turn your back on family.
“You da bomb!” “No, you da bomb!”
In the US, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.
Where did Kobe go after the helicopter crashed? everywhere
Why do orphans go to church? So they have someone to call father
Am I the only one who gives people in the neighborhood names they don't know they have? Like "Blue truck dude", "Loud dog guy", "Nice old lady with the rose bushes", "That slut across the street",
what has two legs and is red all over?
half a cat
What is the difference between the rook and the bishop? The rook goes straight, while the bishop moves diagonally.
Susie was in her mother's room one night. As her mother was getting ready for bed. She had slipped off her blouse, her boobs plum and perky. Susie had asked what are those and will i get them? Her mother had said they were boobs and she would grow some in a few year's. Her mother told susie to find her father and say goodnight. So susie left, headed down the hall to the bathroom where her father was showering . Susie knocked on the door, he said come in. He had moved the shower curtain over just a bit. Susie said she loved him, and then seen her father's dick. Shocked, susie asked her father what that was and if she would get one. Her father said it was a dick, he said susie would get it after her mother went to bed .
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, for instance when you push them down the stairs.
What did the little boy say to the fat man?
How many Japs did you get?
