Morbid jokes
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It doesn't matter, he's dead.
Women.
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.
What is black and screams?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
I'm Gay.
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
How can you tell when a cabbage is boiled?
The wheelchair floats to the top.
How do you get bubblegum out of your hair?
Cancer.
Why is Santa's sack so big?
He only comes once a year.
What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?
Cancer.
What's the best thing about abortion jokes?
They never get old.
Why was the guitar teacher arrested?
For fingering a minor.
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day.
Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
What's the best thing about 28 year olds?
- There's 20 of them.
My life.
Dark humor is like food.
Not everyone gets it.
What's the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
What did the dinosaur eat when the dentist fixed his tooth?
The dentist!
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.