Your forehead is so big, the moon landing was there.
Q: What do you call a "Wild Man" or "Wild Woman" on the Moon?
A: A Luna-Tic!
Why did the cow jump over the moon?
Because the farmer had cold hands!
Why is the moon always hungry? It is almost never full.
My brother is ugly. One time he stuck his head out the window. The police arrested for mooning.
I stayed up all night trying to follow the sun... Then it dawned on me.
Yo mama so fat, when she joined NASA, they put her in orbit and the next day there was a lunar eclipse.
โDad, can you explain to me what a solar eclipse is?โ
No sun.
I was in a haunted house today. Nothing scared me until I reached the last room, where I saw the scariest Halloween ghost I've ever seen. He took my pens and ghosted. I was told that I saw Pristiano Penaldo and I was lucky enough to see him because he performs once in a blue moon.
What kind of fish comes out at night?
A starfish.
What road goes all the way to the sky? A highway.
Why does the sky think it's so powerful?
Because it's always looking down on us.
Why isn't the Moon Emo anymore?
Turns out it was just a phase.
Did you know that Uranus is as big as the moon?
Why did the cow go to outer space?
To see the moooon!
What is money called on the moon?
Mooney.
I am Buzz Aldrin, the second man to walk on the moon.
Neil before me.
Men built civilisations. Men went to the moon. Men invented the modern comforts of todayโs society.
Women did none of those. They are useless, only fit to be baby making machines.
If I were an object in this world, I'd be a glass! Because if you leave me when I'm too close to the edge, I will likely shatter and break.
If I was a pizza topping, I would be pineapple! Because everybody doubts me.
I'm a star! Because one of these days, I'm going to crash and burn...
If I could choose what creature I come back as after I die, I'd be a panda, because people would give a shit if I went extinct.
I'm like the sun; I'm painful to look at.
If I was a food, I would be chopped liver because nobody likes me.
I'm like an eggshell... broken and empty.
If I was a mythical creature, I'd be a unicorn! Because nobody believes in me.
I'm like a flashlight with old batteries inside because my inner light died a long time ago.
My soul is a raisin because it's dried up, shriveled, and not everyone likes it.
I'm like the moon because you only get to see one side of me.
I'm like the moon because as the month progresses, my life becomes covered more and more by darkness.
I'm like an extremely powerful fan! Because I push everyone away.
I'm like a disposable camera! People use me once and then just throw me away.
I'm like a shitty book cover... because people think they have the right to judge and label me before they read my pages.
My brain and body is essentially a really old married couple that can't afford to go through with the divorce, and now they are stuck in a toxic relationship they are desperate to escape, but the more they try, the more they sink into the quicksand that is my depression and anxiety.
Help me....
yo mama so fat when god said let there be light! she blocked the sun.now we call her the moon
