Moon jokes
Did you know a full moon is perfect for a werewolf to come out?
I’m gay.
Codenames for them FUCKING drugs, my crackhead ngas.
Cannabis: Weed, Pot, Ganja, Herb, Grass, Mary Jane, Bud, Chronic, Kush, Trees, Hash, Hashish (concentrates).
Cocaine: Coke, Blow, Snow, Dust, Charlie, White girl, Pearl, Nose candy, Rail, Sniff.
Crack Cocaine: Rock, Hard, Nuggets, Dice, Jelly beans, Moon rocks, Sugar block.
Heroin: Smack, H, Dope, Junk, Black tar, Brown sugar, China white, Horse, Dragon, Skag.
Methamphetamine (Meth): Crank, Speed, Chalk, Ice, Crystal, Glass, Shards, Tina.
MDMA (Ecstasy/Molly): E, X, XTC, Molly, Beans, Adam, Happy pill, Love drug, Dancing shoes.
LSD: Acid, Tabs, Doses, Dots, Blotter, Window pane, Sugar cubes.
Ketamine: Special K, K, Vitamin K, Cat Valium, Green K.
What do you call a black man on the moon?
An astronaut, you fucking racist.
“Dad, can you explain to me what a solar eclipse is?”
No sun.
My brother is ugly. One time he stuck his head out the window. The police arrested for mooning.
Your smile is so nice that the moon shines off them.
Your mom is so fat that the photographer had to go to the moon just to click the photo of her belly button.
Yo mama so fat that when she landed on the moon, instead of saying "One small step for man kind," she said, "One small step for world domination!"
Why did the cow go to outer space?
To see the moooon!
What was the first sport played on the moon?
Capture the flag.
Your mama smells so bad that everytime she goes outside, she gets ticketed for pollution. She's so ugly that everytime she looks out a window, she gets arrested for mooning.
Why isn't the Moon Emo anymore?
Turns out it was just a phase.
My uncles like the moon.
He comes out at night.
Yo mama's so ugly, she looked out the window and was arrested for mooning.
Yo mama so fat, she went to the moon without leaving Earth.
Your forehead's so big that I was tryna figure out if that was you or the moon.
Why can't my grandma talk?
Because she's dead.
I was in a haunted house today. Nothing scared me until I reached the last room, where I saw the scariest Halloween ghost I've ever seen. He took my pens and ghosted. I was told that I saw Pristiano Penaldo and I was lucky enough to see him because he performs once in a blue moon.
What is money called on the moon?
Mooney.
I am Buzz Aldrin, the second man to walk on the moon.
Neil before me.