Money jokes
The ocean will kill you to death expensively if you're on Titanic. Buying the tickets was a waste of money.
Mom: Hey hun, need some money for lunch at school?
Son: No, I got 1k already.
Mom: Wait, what, how?
Son: Mom's wallet is magic.
Yo mamma's so fat, she had to pull down her pants to get to her wallet!
Why do elephants never get rich?
Because they work for peanuts!
Lol, I keep stealing my dad's medication money, and the best part is he never remembers.
Why do orphans like Monopoly?
To cry about the money they can’t earn in real life.
What do you call a bank robbery with MrBeast?
A donation team.
Why did the orphan play Monopoly? To at least get some money. #fake
Why do emo people go to the store with no money?
Because they just scan their bar code and get everything free.
When you're so rich that you can buy anything, you end up getting a cow in your living room. Yeah, anyways, my ex is still in my living room.
What did the leper say to the hooker? "You can keep the tip."
Are you free tomorrow?
No, I’m expensive, sorry. 💵💸
Gimme a nickel or I'll tickle your pickle!
How to make the kissing in a tree recognizable: me and you k.i.s.s.i.n.g., tree sitting, wedding, love, then comes love, then comes baby in the carriage, then hate comes, divorce and purse.
FEW!!!!!!!
Why did the man laugh when he only had just one nickel and one penny in his pocket?
He had a 6 cents of humor.
The orphan had to earn money because he/she didn't have parents to give him/her an allowance.
Q: What do you call a rich Asian? A: Dr.
I like men like I like money, always getting lost under my bed.
No, "quarter quarter."
Yo, Rob, you forgot to pay me cause you sucky sucky my thang.
AKA, you're up for adoption.