Mom jokes
Note to all moms of teens, keep a dog. That way, someone is excited to see you!
Me sais yes to mom when she seis wha is 1 plus 1 and me is says NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! looooooooooooooooooolllolololololol
Orphanage kid: You’re ugly!
Kid with mother: Your mom!
One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card, and we live far, and my mom was hungry.
A guy and his friend had a car and asked us if we were lost. We said no, we have no ride, no money, and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each, so I was driving the car and my mom gave both guys a blowjob. We had to get out of the car to look for something, then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I asked what the bad news was. They said that they're not taking us home, so I asked what the good news was. They told me that they fed my mom and drove off. I guess where they left us wasn't a long walk and my mom wasn't hungry anymore.
Your mom is so fat that when she fell on the sidewalk, nobody laughed, but the sidewalk cracked up.
Your mom is a mom!
I saw your forehead and realized your mom and dad's foreheads were as big as yours. Also, you're gay.
My mom is telling me to get off Friday Night Funkin' or she will slam my head against the keyboard: weherhrqqkh[qokqho[krq3[t4i2-4q43q343q44334q43.
If you make a joke about me, I'll tell my mom.
If mom saw you, she would die and be happy because of you being ugly.
Your mom: Your plate is full, that's enough food on your plate.
Me: My plate is not full, I still see the white of the plate.
Your mom is so fat the space shuttle can see her from 10,000 miles away.
When my mom said you have to listen to classical music at my new school, I had to listen to it twenty-four seven. After that, I sang the song [with] the wrong melody for my music teacher 😎
Why do orphans hate Cocomelon?
Because his mom and dad are in every episode!
What's the difference between your mom and a troll?
Nothing, they both look the same.
My mom telling me the brief history of the blanket and how she received it from her cousin. ( ╹▽╹ )
Me sitting anxiously in place pretending to be amazed by the story, and reacting with kind cheerfulness and a big smile. (◍•ᴗ•◍)
All I can actually think about: "I m@sturbated under it- aaaaaah" ಠ◡ಠ
Your mom.
Yo mom is so fat when she went to sit on the couch it said, "To be continued."
My mom told me to be positive...
I was heading to an HIV test.
I asked, "Mom, what's that in the sky?"
Mom replied with, "That's your father."