Mom jokes
A girl walks in the room. She asks her mom, "Why's my name Flower?" Her mom said, "When you were born, a flower fell on your head." Brick walks in the room. Jasvidnqzkdvsosbd.
Why did the baby cow cross the road?
To find its mom who has the milk.
How do you get an orphan sad?
You say you will tell their mom that they have been a baaaaaad boy.
My mom said I rely on my devices too much, so I unplugged her life support.
My mom is in the FBI. My dad is in the FBI. My sister is in the FBI. My brother is in the FBI. And do you know what I am?
Divorced.
Guy on Fortnite: "Ima sleep with your mom lmao."
Orphan: Starts crying.
Why does that kid have to stay in that orphanage?
He should just go to his mom and dad!
How do you make an orphan shut up?
You tell his mom.
My mom told me to get off the computer or she will slam my head into the keyboard.
I don't think she lskdjfklsdjf.
What's the difference between your mom and a fat female cow...
A female cow doesn't have a dick.
Knock, knock.
Your mom.
Mom died, so I planted mums and forget-me-nots all over her grave site.
You tell an orphan joke to an orphan. You start laughing, they start crying. They say they are going to tell their mom. Then you start laughing harder.
My mom loved taking pics of me when I was a child. Thanks to that, people really believe my fake smiles! :3
Boy/girl: I love you.
Me: I love me too! But sorry, my mom said I can't date trash. Go back to the trashcan.
The boy/girl: I- *Is depressed*
When you were born, your mom said you were out of bounds, so you went flying out of the hospital.
Little Johnny runs up to his mother and says, "Mommy, mommy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, daddy came in with the lady next door and they started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off daddy's clothes and daddy took off the clothes from the lady next door, and they both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of daddy and started...". The mother cuts him off and says "Just stop right there. You wait until your daddy comes home so you can tell him everything you just told me." Couple hours later the father arrives and walks through the door to find his wife and child with bags packed. She walks up to him and slaps across the face shouting "I'm leaving you... Go ahead Johnny, tell him what you told me earlier." Johnny steps forward to tell his daddy. "Daddy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, you came in with the lady next door and you both started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off your clothes and you took off the clothes from the lady next door, and you both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of you and started doing the same thing mom did with uncle Joe last summer."
Your mom is so fat, she wakes up on both sides of the bed.
What do you call your mom?
Basement bound.
Yo momma's so ugly Thanos had to snap twice.