Midget jokes
What phone do midgets use?
A MICROphone.
Once there was a midget man jumping on a pothole saying 43, 43, 43. A kid walks up to the man and says, "Why are you saying 43, 43, 43?"
The man stops and looks at him, then he starts jumping again and says 43, 43, 43.
The kid asked him again and so on.
Then the man stops, opens the pothole, throws the kid in, closes it, and starts jumping and says 44, 44, 44!!!"
What's the best thing about midgets??
They don't need to bend while giving blowjobs.
What do you call a pissed off midget?
A micro-aggression.
When midgets smoke weed, do they get high or do they get medium?
When a midget smokes weed, do they get high or medium?
If a midget walks up to you and tells you your hair smells nice, is that sexual harassment?
Why shouldn’t you pick on a midget with learning difficulties?
... Because it’s not big and it’s not clever.
Why couldn’t the midget ride the bus?
He can’t slam dunk his bus fare!
What's the difference between a midget and a tall person? Only one of them can ride the rides.
Friend says, "You were so drunk last night, you threw a mushroom at a midget and said, 'Grow, Mario, grow.'"
Q: What do you call a funny midget?
A: Kevin
Do you want to know how to make a Smurf? CHOKE A MIDGET!
What do you call an ice skating dwarf?
A midget spinner.
Why do midgets need a lot of books at school?
So they can reach the top of the desk.
What do you call an epileptic midget that works at Little Caesars?
Little Seizures.
A midget walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender says no.
The midget asks why. The bartender says, "You're a little drunk!"
Do gay midgets come out of the cabinet?
I was walking by a prison when I saw a midget in an orange jumpsuit climbing down the fence. When he hit the ground and sneered at me, I said, “Well, that’s a little condescending.”
Tyson?