Michael Jackson jokes
Why was Michael Jackson kicked out of boy scouts? He was up to a pack a day!
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite holiday? 4th of July when they set off fireworks.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite thing to eat from? The children's menu.
"So I asked a genie if he could grant me this wish. I wished to be like Michael Jackson. The next day, I was in a playground full of little kids."
Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding got together back in the day for a horse racing venture. Tonya says, "I'll handle the handicapping, you go ride the 3-year-olds."
What does Michael Jackson ask little boys before going to bed? Are you sleeping?
Why does Michael Jackson avoid Pepsi? They gave him a hot one.
What do White Castle sliders and Michael Jackson have in common? They have their meat in tiny wet buns.
What's Pee-Wee Herman's favorite Michael Jackson song?
Beat It.
Why did Michael Jackson decide to sell the ranch?
Because it was over 10 years old.
What does Michael Jackson and McDonald's have in common?
They both use 30-year-old meat in between two-year-old buns.
Me: Now I know why Michael Jackson turned white.
The police: You finally figured it out.
What did they do with his body when he died?
They made him into Lego so kids can play with him for once.
There's a new game in the arcade where kids can hit raging paedophiles with a mallet: Whack-A-Jack, oh!
In honor of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as other establishments, are introducing the Jackson dog. It's a 50 year old sausage between two 7 year old buns, with everything on it.
The teacher asked a young boy in primary school, "Can you tell me the alphabet?"
To which the boy replies, "No."
The teacher then sets his homework to learn the alphabet.
At home, the boy goes up to his mum, who is on the phone, and asks, "Can you tell me the alphabet?"
"Shut up," she replied.
The boy goes to his dad, who just won the footie match, and asks, "Can you teach me the alphabet?"
But the dad is too busy celebrating and shouting, "Hell yeah! Hell yeah! Yeaaahh!"
The boy goes to his big brother and asks him to teach him the alphabet.
But his brother is singing, "I'm Michael Jackson, I'm Michael Jackson!"
The boy goes to his sister and asks her for the alphabet.
But his sister is singing, "In my big red car, in my big red car!"
The next day the teacher asks him the alphabet.
The boy replies, "Shut up."
"Alright, I'm sending you to the principal's office right now."
The boy replies, "Hell yeah! Hell yeah! Yeaaahh!"
In the office, the principal says, "Who do you think you are?"
The boy replies, "I'm Michael Jackson, I'm Michael Jackson!"
The principal now says, "How do you think you'll get away with this?"
The boy then replies, "In my big red car, in my big red car!"
What's worse than ants down your pants? Michael Jackson.
Q: What do Burger King and Michael Jackson have in common?
A: They put meat on five-year-old buns.
What do Michael Jackson and Tesco carrier bags have in common? They’re both made out of plastic and harmful to children.
What are Michael Jackson's pronouns? "He he."