Mexican jokes
The Mexican landscaper came to cut our lawn. My mom was happy then asked him, "Can I have some of your burrito?" He said, "Yeah." I said, "Whatever."
A few minutes later, my mom told me to cut the lawn. I said, "Why do I have to do it? That's what he's there for." My mom said, "He's going to do the burrito for me." Then I said, "Okay." I finished cutting the lawn and went in the house. I see my mom giving the landscaper a blow job. I said to my mom, "What are you doing?" My mom said, "What does it look like? I'm having my burrito." The landscaper told me that I missed a spot while cutting the lawn.
I love climbing over walls because my ancestry was Mexican.
What sport are Mexicans the best at?
Cross country.
"Knock, knock!""Who's there?""Abby."
"Abby who?""Your Mexican girlfriend."
Did you hear about the Mexican emo band? They're called "Hispanic at the Disco."
What did the Mexican firefighter name his two sons?
Jose and Hose B.
So here’s this funny story, and it’s true.
So my mom has this friend. When this guy was a kid, he was on the school bus, and this Mexican kid checked him into the aisle, so he hits him across the face with a metal lunchbox, and he started bleeding. Then they both get banned from the bus for a few days, so him and his dad drive to the Mexican kids house, and his dad says to the Mexican kids dad “if your kid ever picks on my kid again, I’m gonna come back to this house and kick your ass!”
What do you call a ball with no hair? A Mexican ball.
Why do Mexicans wear pointed boots?
So they can climb a fence easier.
What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower?
Unemployed.
Why can't Mexicans cross the border? They always sneak powder in.
Why are Mexicans good at Uno?
They always steal the green card.
What does a pizza and a Mexican have in common?
One can feed a family.
What would the main character from Martin Scorsese's Taxi Driver be named if he was a Mexican?
Travis Spick-le.
What is Mexican's favorite food? A taco.
What do you call a retarded Mexican?
Ricardo.
What is a Mexican's least favorite type of water?
I.C.E. water.
What do you call a Mexican with an m3?
A greaser.
Why don’t Mexicans have sex education and driver's education on the same day?
Because the donkey gets tired.
A: What do you call a sophisticated American? B: Canadian.
A: Why aren't there any Mexicans in Canada? B: They can't run that far.
«A: Что вы называете искушенным американцем? Б: Канадец.
A: Почему в Канаде нет ни одного мексиканца? Б: Они не могут убежать так далеко».