Mexican jokes
"Knock, knock!""Who's there?""Abby."
"Abby who?""Your Mexican girlfriend."
So here’s this funny story, and it’s true.
So my mom has this friend. When this guy was a kid, he was on the school bus, and this Mexican kid checked him into the aisle, so he hits him across the face with a metal lunchbox, and he started bleeding. Then they both get banned from the bus for a few days, so him and his dad drive to the Mexican kids house, and his dad says to the Mexican kids dad “if your kid ever picks on my kid again, I’m gonna come back to this house and kick your ass!”
Why do Mexicans wear pointed boots?
So they can climb a fence easier.
What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower?
Unemployed.
What do you call a ball with no hair? A Mexican ball.
What is a Mexican's least favorite type of water?
I.C.E. water.
For those of you greener than a Mexican's card when it comes to this website, it's darker than the unemployment line.
How do sick Mexicans say hello?
"Ebola."
A: What do you call a sophisticated American? B: Canadian.
A: Why aren't there any Mexicans in Canada? B: They can't run that far.
«A: Что вы называете искушенным американцем? Б: Канадец.
A: Почему в Канаде нет ни одного мексиканца? Б: Они не могут убежать так далеко».
Why don’t Mexicans have sex education and driver's education on the same day?
Because the donkey gets tired.
What would the main character from Martin Scorsese's Taxi Driver be named if he was a Mexican?
Travis Spick-le.
Why can't Mexicans cross the border? They always sneak powder in.
Why are Mexicans good at Uno?
They always steal the green card.
What does a pizza and a Mexican have in common?
One can feed a family.
What do you call a Mexican with an m3?
A greaser.
What is Mexican's favorite food? A taco.
How do you get black kids to stop jumping off the bed?
You put Velcro on the ceiling.
How do you get the black kids down?
You invite the Mexicans over.
There was a house with a three-story building.
The first one had Mexicans.
The second one had Africans.
The third one had white people.
An earthquake came.
But who did survive?
The white family because they were at work.
So, there's a black guy, a white guy, and a Mexican. They find a genie's lamp, they rub it, and poof! Appears the genie!
The genie goes to the black guy and asks, "What's your one wish?" The black guy goes, "I wish for me and all my people to be back in Africa, happy and everything." So poof! His wish is granted.
Then, the genie goes to the Mexican and asks, "What's your one wish?" The Mexican goes, "I wish for me and all my people to be in Mexico, happy and everything." So poof! His wish is granted.
Now, the genie goes over to the white guy and asks, "What's your one wish?" and the white guy asks, "You mean to tell me that all the black and Mexican people are out of America?" The genie replies, "Yes."
The white guy goes, "Then I'll have a Coke."
Why didn't Donald Trump build the wall?
Because Mexicans did not and would not build the damn wall!