Mexican jokes

What is a Mexican's least favorite type of water?

I.C.E. water.

How do you get black kids to stop jumping off the bed?

You put Velcro on the ceiling.

How do you get the black kids down?

You invite the Mexicans over.

There was a house with a three-story building.

The first one had Mexicans.

The second one had Africans.

The third one had white people.

An earthquake came.

But who did survive?

The white family because they were at work.

So, there's a black guy, a white guy, and a Mexican. They find a genie's lamp, they rub it, and poof! Appears the genie!

The genie goes to the black guy and asks, "What's your one wish?" The black guy goes, "I wish for me and all my people to be back in Africa, happy and everything." So poof! His wish is granted.

Then, the genie goes to the Mexican and asks, "What's your one wish?" The Mexican goes, "I wish for me and all my people to be in Mexico, happy and everything." So poof! His wish is granted.

Now, the genie goes over to the white guy and asks, "What's your one wish?" and the white guy asks, "You mean to tell me that all the black and Mexican people are out of America?" The genie replies, "Yes."

The white guy goes, "Then I'll have a Coke."

Why didn't Donald Trump build the wall?

Because Mexicans did not and would not build the damn wall!

Why don’t Mexicans have an Olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump, and swim are in the USA.

Q: Why did the Mexican start taking anti-anxiety pills?

A: Because he was taking them for His-panic attacks.

"9/11" or just "7-Eleven" to a Mexican person.

Do you want to wear my sombrero?

Or is that nacho style?

A Canadian, an American, and a Mexican were tasked by a billionaire with teaching his stubborn pet parrot how to speak within 2 weeks.

They were given everything they needed to succeed, and a large sum of money was offered to the one who made the parrot talk first.

The Canadian played documentaries for the parrot through the whole duration. He spent all his time citing the alphabet and reading stories for the parrot.

The American showered him with the finest food, brought him all the females that he can mate with, and made sure to spoil the parrot as much as he can.

The Mexican locked the parrot in a dark room, barely gave him any food or water, and beat the shit out of him every single day.

When the time was up, the billionaire returned to find the parrot still unable to speak, so he asked the 3 trainers about their progress.

The Canadian goes: "I have tried everything. I spent all my time and energy teaching him the alphabet and reading books to him! Nothing worked."

The American agrees: "I have spoiled him beyond belief, gave him all the luxury he can possibly get, and yet he won't speak!"

The Mexican confirms: "I have showered him with love and luxury as well, tried to teach him words day and night, spent all my time and energy spoiling him with everything I had!"

The parrot looks at the Mexican with disbelief and yells out: "You lying motherfucker!"

How to decorate a wall:

Strip off the paper and original plaster.

Put on fresh plaster and wallpaper.

Paint it (if you want).

Send a bill to North America and wait patiently for a reply.

I'm Gay.

Why did the tamale go to the hospital?

because estava malito :)

I got no joke.

What do you call the Spanish translation of the 9th Star Wars movie?

Rogue Juan.

Why did the Mexican take the tamale to the hospital?

Tamlito.

Not a joke but I hope the ones who are making jokes about Mexicans are Mexican themselves, lmao, cuz if you're not, uh... I think we both know what you are. 😟

I was gonna make a joke about Mexicans but honestly, it crosses the line.

I bOi jug go CMC?

There was a Mexican magician. He was going to disappear on the count of three.

1-2-..... and he left without a trace.