Uno jokes

A Mexican was doing a magic trick. He said, "uno, dos," then disappeared without a trace.

Why do people not play Uno with Mexicans? Because they are always stealing the green cards.

Why can't you play Uno with Mexicans? They steal all the green cards.

There was once a Spanish magician. He said, "Uno, dos..." and he disappeared without a tres.

A Mexican magician says he will disappear on the count of three. He says, "uno, dos..." and poof! He disappears without a tres.

My girlfriend was cheating in Uno.

She's not the only one who can play that game.

I played Uno with my Mexican friend.

That bastard took all the green cards!

A Spanish magician is trying the disappearing trick. He counts "Uno, dos..." and leaves no trace.

I don't know, my friend did it.

Why can't you play Uno with a Mexican? Because they'll steal all the green cards.

Why are Mexicans good at Uno?

They always steal the green card.

You know how 6 was afraid of 7 because 7 8 9?

Well, how do you think 10 feels being in the middle of 9 11?

There was a news story the other day where a magician disappeared. He was like "At the count of 3 I will disappear aight...Uno, Dos," and he disappeared without a trace.

What game is for kids? Uno.

Free blacks in the Civil War is the same as me drawing a reverse card in Uno.

Bomb goes Uno.

Boy: Your dick is so small, oh wait, you don't have one.

Older boy: UNO reverse card!

If there's ever a shooting at school, pull out an Uno reverse card.

5 out of 6 scientists say Russian Roulette is safe.

My fifth wife asked me to help her dig in the garden. Here we go again.

You do 1 line, you're not a crackhead. You drink 1 beer, you're not an alcoholic. But I murder 1 person...

How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? -- One. They are efficient and don't have humor.