McDonald's

McDonald's jokes

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Fat

  • Your momma's so fat she started "Fat Lives Matter". Meetings are everyday:

    11 o'clock McDonald's, 12 o'clock KFC, 1 o'clock Pizza Hut.

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  • Karen

  • Karen walks into McDonald's.

    Lady at the counter: HI what can I get for you today??

    Karen: I want 1 SMALL FRIES PLEASE AND MAKE IT SNAPPY LITTLE NOODLE!

    Lady at the counter: yes miss.

    Karen: I WILL NOW INSPECT THIS.

    Lady at the counter: *sweats*

    Karen: THIS IS NOT SALTY ENOUGHT! GET ME THE MANAGER KNOW, SKINY NOODLE!

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    Ice Cream machine

  • Little boy: Momma?

    Mom: Yes, my dear.

    Little boy: One day I wanna work in McDonald's.

    Mom: Why!?

    Little boy: Just to see if their ice cream machine is actually broken.

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    Michael Jackson

  • Despite Michael Jackson’s legal problems while he was alive, McDonald’s is still going to honor his life achievements in the music industry by naming a sandwich after him.

    They’re going to call it the McMichael! It’s going to be a fifty year old piece of meat pressed between two eight year old buns.

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    Penaldo

  • I was the manager at a McDonald’s in Turin when I saw Penaldo walk in and submit a job application. I asked him to show me his skills and experience, but he just started diving and asking for pens and tap-ins. I was confused until Penaldo told me that’s all he knows how to do.

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