Make jokes

What makes it cold in a room? Air conditioning.

To all of you making jokes about orphans, it’s all fun and games until both of your parents leave you.

LMFAO (my parents left me and it’s not the funniest thing ever)

I never knew what my dad's job was.

One day, at school, I got a scam phone call, later, I got another, and another. I finally had enough and answered the phone, but to make an impact I said "Hello?"

My dad answered...

Kiss a girl on the forehead make her happy for a day.

If you give her anal you'll make her whole weak.

Producer: We need to stop testing out products on animals.

CEO: Shampoo companies do it all the time.

Fairchild Republic making the A-10 Thunder Bolt.

I was making holy water, and my girlfriend walked in, saying, "What are you doing?"

I said, "Making holy water."

She said, "How are you making holy water?"

I'm boiling the hell out of it.

Next time you get a call from anybody, say, "Hi, welcome to Dave's orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may I help you?"

Or,

"Hi, welcome to Pizza and Abortion clinic, your loss is our sauce!"

There is only one reason why I find women useful.

That is because they make sandwiches, but that is about it.

He: I am 60 and I have to slog 12 hours a day to make a living. Do you call it life?

She: I am 28 and still a virgin, do you call it life?

Person one: What did the DJ name his son?

Person two: IDK, what?

Person one: Erik (while making a DJ motion).

My sis said only garlic and onions can make you cry.

So I threw an orange at her.

If you're pan, all you have to do is get a sibling and make them get your parents to the outside of the pantry, and you burst out and then say you're pansexual!

Weedle will make you high.

I guess Grandpa took the elevator to Heaven.

He definitely didn't make it up the stairs.

Seven days without a pun makes one weak.

Regular depressed person: I'm depressed, so I'll go see a therapist.

Me: I'm depressed, so I won't do anything about it, work on many projects at the same time, destroying my sanity slowly while relying on caffeine and pills as my only way to take down my headaches, and making memes about it online to help myself cope with the pain.

What's it called when a Black person makes a joke? A joke, you racist.

JK, dark humor.

A man entered the bank branch and asked the teller to withdraw his account balance. The teller debited his account and gave the man all his money. Then the man counted the money and asked the teller to deposit it back into his account.

The teller asked the man why he withdrew the money and deposited it back. Then the man replied, "I wanted to make sure all my money is safe and tallies with my records."

Lol

(First Person): Knock knock, who's there? (2nd Person): Lemme talk to you, when we finna slide, what we finna do, knock knock, who's there, time to make a move, slayin' all then demons and we gotta move in too.

(Second Person): Knock knock, (1st p): who's there, let me talk to you, be careful where you steppin' out cause you ain't bullet proof, knock knock, who's there? time to make a move, block is full of shooters, and they didn't come to hoop.

You're so ugly you make gay/lesbian people straight!