Change

Anonymous

How many feminist does it take to change a lightbulb?

What makes you think feminist can change anything

Hell

Anonymous

How do you make holy water?

You take normal water, and boil the hell out of it.

Darkness

Anonymous

What’s the same about “Make a Wish Program” and “Dark Jokes”?

They never get old.

Sister

KittyKat

My sister argued with me that you can’t make a car out of spaghetti, you should have seen her face when I drove pasta

Butterfly

sofunnyitsbad

one day I came to my mom and said “MOM!!! I can make a butterfly!”

mom: “no you can’t…”

me: throws butter out the window me: “look I made a butterfly!”

lol this isn’t funny but I hope you liked it

Sister

Ayyyyyy

Little Johhny is walking around and peaks in his parents room, catching them having sex so he asks, “What are you guys doing?” and they reply “Nothing, nothing! we’re just uh, making cake” and they send him away. So he continues walking around and he hears some strange noises coming from his brothers room so he walks in and catches his brother and his brothers girlfriend having sex and then asks him “What are you guys doing?” and his brother yells “Get out! were making cake!” So Johnny leaves and goes to his room. The next day the whole family is at the dinner table and Little Johnny turns to his sister and says “So, you and your boyfriend were making cake last night huh!” and she replies “OMG! Howd you know!?!?” and Johnny replies “Because, I licked the icing off the couch” ayyyyyy.

Baby

Cockameme

Why cant two chinese people have a white baby ?

Because two wongs dont make a white

Shooting

Anonymous

If a person shoot’s a person about to commit suicide, is it making it less painful or is it murder?

Bill

Russiansantalikesvodka

Santa and Bill Cosby’s favorite quote " don’t be dumb make sure they’re numb and always use a condom!"

Depression

Anonymous

Lets make a joke on how depressing monday is to ignore how depressing everyday is.

Depression

Anonymous

I’m a Model. my doctor asked me to make an acronym for POST because I post pictures on Instagram. (Trying to) P-ut O-ff Suicidal T-houghts

Juice

Anonymous

Why did the blondie put her ipad in the blender: to make apple juice.

Box

Daniel King

How do you make a fruit punch? 🍎 You give it a pair of boxing gloves. 🥊

Speed

Anonymous

Whats the point of hiding the screaming speedbump you ran over? You might as well hit it again to A: Stop the screaming B:Make it look like an actually speed bump and C:… You think its Hilarious the noise it makes when you ran over its stomach

Orphan

Your Uncle

Why do some couples make their status “single” after a small argument? Like I don’t put “orphan” after I get into an argument with my family.

Time

Anonymous

Why can’t Indians play football… cause every time they take a corner they make a shop

Son

Anonymous

I tried to explain to my 4 year old son that it’s perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants. – But he’s still making fun of me.

Die

2cool4school

What noise does Steven hawkings make when he dies? Windows shutting down theme tune

Ice

Anonymous

Where do you learn to make ice cream? – Sundae school.

Baby

The Coffee is morbider

Trying to make a baby talk is like trying to negotiate with north korea

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