Like this,
it will give you good luck. See for yourself!
Playing Russian roulette alone means you're bound to be a winner eventually.
A Catholic Priest and a Rabbi were chatting one day when the conversation turned to a discussion of job descriptions and promotion.
"What do you have to look forward to in way of a promotion in your job?" asked the Rabbi.
"Well, I'm next in line for the Monsignor's job," replied the Priest.
"Yes, and then what?" asked the Rabbi.
"Well, next I can become Bishop," said the Priest.
"Yes, and then?" asked the Rabbi.
"If I work real hard and do a good job as Bishop, it's possible for me to become an Archbishop," said the Priest.
"O.K., then what?" asked the Rabbi.
The Priest, beginning to get a bit exasperated, replied, "With some luck and real hard work, maybe I can become a Cardinal."
"And then?" asked the Rabbi.
The Priest is really starting to get mad now and replies, "With lots and lots of luck and some real difficult work and if I'm in the right places at the right times and play my political games just right, maybe, just maybe, I can get elected Pope."
"Yes, and then what?" asked the Rabbi.
"Good grief!" shouted the Priest. "What do you expect me to become, GOD?"
"Well," said the Rabbi, "One of our boys made it!"
Little Johnny said to his mate, "I bet I can make you swear." His mate said, "Good luck." So Johnny told his mate that he slept with his sister. His mate yelled, "I'm gonna fucking kill you!"
My family is lucky I was born so smart. Every time my Dad is struggling at work, he always turns to me when he needs to get ahead.
Like This For Good Luck!
What is it called when a depressed person gets a stroke?
A stroke of luck :)
Comment and join Dumbledore's army in the community to give someone you hate permanent bad luck.
Like this post to give someone you hate bad luck.
Why did the African win the food eating contest?
Beginner's luck.
So the teacher goes up to you and says, "I'm going to call your parents." Me: "Good luck finding them."
No joke. I just want to say that my thoughts are with the Ukrainian people, and I wish them the best. Best of luck.
Why are orphans lucky?
Because they can get in trouble and nobody can tell their parents.
Life is karma... because I was born, God gifted me with social awkwardness, sh*t athletic skills, and stupidity.
I have no problem getting dates online. I’ve also had luck with almonds, cashews, and walnuts.
Rachel won the lottery twice in two years. Her friend Jim called her every day asking for tips on winning, just the same. Then one day, simply to get rid of him, Rachel said, "Watch two martial arts movies, eat three pieces of hard beef jerky, and pick a fight at a bar."
Jim replied with a shocked look, "That's what I do after Mr. Tugman shakes my hand too long."
I've got an impressive record at Russian roulette. Retired after one loss ever.
So I ran into a woman the other day who says her vaginas is like a lottery ticket. She said it's because you have to be lucky to hit it... I thought it's because she was always scratching it.
Why is there a 76 button on a bottle of ketchup?
To bring sweet luck.
Why are orphans lucky?
Because when they drive, they don’t need a license plate, because they don’t have a home.
