Love jokes
Me: *sprays some perfume on myself*
Friend: Omg, that smells so good! You’re so aromatic, how do you not have a bf yet?
Me: ... I’m aromantic and aromatic. I do not desire romantic relationships with others although I do enjoy carrying lovely scents with me.
For all the talk of Donald Trump loving America, most of his lovers are imported from Eastern Europe.
My cousin really loves baseball.
He always brags about how many home runs he hit in the minors.
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
A piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Oh, Bunsen, my flame," the sodium swooned. "I melt whenever I see you!"
The Bunsen burner replied, "Calm down. It's just a phase you're going through."
Islamist guys and American Christian right-wing guys are both similar in that both abhor the existence of gay people, but only the Christian Right loves to eat sausages, especially the little ones, if you know what I mean...
Why does your grandma like gardening so much?
Because she loves getting dirty down on her knees.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES winter sports?
Ice Cube.
What do you call a rapper who loves gardening?
Dr. Dre-seed.
Why is it that skinny men love fat women?
Because we need warmth in the winter and shade in the summer.
Do y'all love God?
Do y'all love Jesus, God? 🙏❤️
For the encore, we'd love to tell you a construction joke but... we're still working on it.
You know, you should adopt a pet. So then you can feel the pain that your parents felt when they adopted you... wait... also the regret after.
They say you should love your neighbor. Does that mean I have to love the president?
What happens when you eat a cat?
I love to eat cats for dinner!
A buddy and I checked out some books from a local library. When we returned them, he said, "Your sister works the returns, right?" I told him, "Yes, she does, and she will be here in about five minutes." He said, "Why don’t we put a cookbook in the women’s sports section?" I told him, "I love it!" So I picked out a Reese Witherspoon book.
What’s the key to a successful relationship?
Consent.
Why did the rapper become a fisherman?
Because they loved dropping BASS.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES space?
Snoop Star.