Love jokes
My girlfriend's sister told me to write her a poem. This is what I came up with:
roses are red, violets are blue, if you ever feel alone, I'm always watching you.
Why was the mountain in love with the volcano?
Because the volcano was hot!
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Look at me again,
It will be the end of you.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue, I’d rather be single than with someone like you.
What did Cinderella say to Prince Charming?
"Want to see if it fits?"
Roses are red. I love hot food. If I was a bad bitch, I'd wanna fuck me too.
Oh wait, I am.
Roses are red, your eyes are brown; never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down.
Why do rappers love the gym?
'Cause they're all about them heavy bars.
Why is hand holding a couple thing? Because they touch each other's genitals anyway.
I love all races, even the bad ones.
What's a prostitute's favorite snack?
Skittles. They love to taste the rainbow.
Roses are red, violets are blue, and if you're my friend, I'll be there till the end.
What song do supportive parents of a closeted child love?
“The Son Will Come Out Tomorrow.”
I just broke up with my mathematician girlfriend. She was obsessed with an X.
What game do emo kids love the most?
Hangman.
Hey, pass me that crowbar, please.
Sure... y’know, before the crowbar was invented, crows had to drink at home.
Are you a blanket? Because I love it when you’re on top of me.
Why do orphans like playing tennis so much?
Because it’s the only way they’ll ever get love.
Why don’t some couples go to the gym?
Because some relationships don’t work out.
My girlfriend really wants me to get her pregnant so she would have a father figure in her life for once.