Loss

Loss jokes

Phone Call

Ahem... if somebody you don't like, or somebody random just calls you in general,

answer the phone with this:

"Hello, thank you for choosing Mama's Pizzeria/Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce, how may I help you?"

or

"Hello, this is David's Orphanage, you make them, we take them, how may I help you?"

Some people's reactions are priceless, and then they wonder about your mental health.

Mom

The twin towers are just like my mom and dad, they went to work and never came back.

Orphan

For this orphan, his dad didn't only go and get the milk. His mom did too.

Death

Roses are red, violets are blue, my mom and dad died, next you'll be gone too.

Memes

Orphan

Why do orphans use water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.

Orphan

What is an orphan's favorite movie? Hint, not Home Alone. It's actually Batman, 'cause they are 50% the same as him.

Orphan

Why are most dark jokes about orphans?

They can't complain to their parents.

Orphan

Why do orphans miss half their basketball season? Cause they don't have home games.

Orphan

I did a knock knock joke to an orphan. I said, "Knock knock." He said, "Who is there?" And I said, "Not your parents."

Car

Q: What do you call a Mexican man that lost his car?

A: Carlos.

Diet

A man in conversation with his friend says that his wife is on a 3-week diet. The friend curiously asks, how much has she lost? The man replies, "her life."

Orphan

What can an elevator do that an orphan’s parents can’t?

The elevator can raise a family.

Dad

What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can’t be found.

Orphan

If you don't like orphan jokes, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ON HERE??!!! WE DON'T ACCEPT YOU HERE!

If you saw an orphan, could you say where your parents at? And if they cry, just say, "hey here are your parents" then grab nothing. Perfect example.