One day at school, I made fun of a girl who lost her hair from cancer, and my parents made me shave my head.
The next day at school, I made fun of an orphan.
Loss Jokes
A man dies, and his friend is invited to his funeral.
This friend asks his wife, "Can I say a word?"
"Of course," she says.
The man stands up and says, "Plethora!"
The man's wife says, "Thanks, it means a lot!"
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphan’s least favorite song? We Are Family.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? Meet the Parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.
Why did the orphan jump off of bridge?
So they can reunite with their dead family.
Me: Hey, are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yeah, what gave me away?
Me: Your parents.
Friend: Hey, wanna race home?
Orphan: What home?
What's the difference between an orphan and a baseball player?
The baseball player knows where home base is.
Why did the orphan cross the road? (Not to see his mom or dad.)
Why do orphans not care about sleep? Because they have no one to wake up to.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home.
How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?
Tell them their parents are waiting when they wake up.
Why can't orphans play baseball? They can't find a home.
Mommy, when will daddy come back?
I'm not your mom...
Me: Knock knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Me: Not your family.
What do you call it when an orphan takes a selfie?
A family portrait.
What's an orphan's favorite game?
"Who's your daddy?"
(Go look up the game)
A game that all orphans hate,
"Who's your Daddy?"
Why did the orphan fall out of a tree?
They thought their parents would catch them.
One day an orphan threw a boomerang. It's not the only thing that didn't come back.
Why can't orphans hit a home run?
Because they don't have a home to run to...
