Longing jokes

Why do emos love the winter? Because of the long sleeves.

A donut and depression are the same. Both have nothing in the middle, and the other is nothing is left if you leave it for too long.

What's the difference between Monday and a dick?

They're not different. They're both unnecessarily long and hard.

Jesus lives on a long timeline, so he may seem slow to you.

Your mama is so stupid that she put a ruler under her pillow to see how long she slept.

A boy walks up to a girl and says, "I would tell you a joke about my dick, but it’s too long."

Then the girl says, "Yeah, I would tell you a joke about my pussy, but you’ll never get it."

What's long and black?

The line at Popeyes.

I was taking my dog on a long walk when I heard a loud scream. I ran towards the sound. There I found Penaldo sinking in a pit of mud. I was trying to help him out when my dog said, "Leave him, he's been in the mud for years." I walked away shocked but not surprised.

What's long, hard, and slimy?

A bar of soap.

Riddle me this, Batman, what's long, round, and has cum in the middle?

Batman: A dick.

Riddler: NO NO NOOO! It's a cucumber!

Your hairline is so long The Rock complimented it!

Your hairline is so long, people call it "The Natural Disaster!"

Are you a keyboard, because I wanna tap you all night long.

Yo mama so fat, she likes long, romantic walks to the refrigerator.

*Riddle:* All men have one, some got long, some got small. The Pope never uses his, and a man gives it to his wife after getting married. What is it?

How do you stop all homophobic heterosexual white men from using all public men's restrooms at a rest area?

Make sure that all public men's restrooms at the rest area are always occupied with gay men that have long and thick big cocks, regardless of skin color.

It's sad when the person that gave you memories becomes a memory.

You know one of the worst feelings ever to exist?

When your parents and friends all still see the happy little kid you used to be...

...but in reality, that kid has been long gone for years. (not my words)

From your Dad.

I won’t be back for a while, it’s a very long line.

How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?

It only takes one, but it takes a long time, and the light bulb has to want to change.

A kid asks his father, "How long is our trip, Dad?"

The kid's father says, "Our trip is a Fortnite."