Location jokes
Q: Who are the fastest readers in the world?
A: New Yorkers. Some of them go through 110 stories in 5 seconds.
What is the slipperiest county?
Greece!
Were you born on a highway? Because that's where accidents mostly happen.
A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an expedition to the Amazon Forest. After a while, they get lost.
So as they are walking, suddenly the bushes jump up into the air and men with spears are there. One man says, "Hey, you're in our sacred land. So what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren’t that crazy so we will let you choose how you die."
The man from France said, "Bring me the poison." The man from Britain said, "Bring me the gun." And the man from New York said, "Bring me a gun as well!"
The guy was confused but still brought the items and gave them to them. The guy from France said, “For the France!” and drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, “Long live the queen!” and shot himself and died. And the man from New York started shooting and laughing like a mad man and said. 3 men lived through this and one said to the others, "Well...sh!# that didn't go as planned."
Why did the Chicken cross the road? You: Why? To get to the little b***h's house!
Knock knock! You: Who's there? The chicken!
Do you know the murderer, The murderer, the murderer, Do you know the murderer, Who lives on Dreary Lane?
Yes, I know the murderer, The muffin man, the murderer, Yes, I know the murderer, Who lives on Dreary Lane?
Did you fall from heaven? Or did you fall from the cliff up there?
When my dad once went to the Virgin Islands, now it's just called the Islands.
Daughter: Where was I born?
Dad: Alabama.
Daughter: That is nice.
Mum: We have never been to Alabama.
Dad: RUN!
Son: Dad, why did you name my sister Paris?
Dad: Because she was made there.
Son: Thanks, Dad.
Dad: You're welcome, Backseat.
There are millions of people in the world, yet you are here.
You know what they say: "Location, location, location." So my dad stuck a thermometer up his butt, and now he has degrees.
Sometimes I wish my gf was here, that way we could have some fun in my bed. Then I realize she's right across the hall. (SWEET HOME ALABAMA)!!
Person: I broke my arm in three places.
Doctor: Well, don't go to those three places then.
What's your favorite Fortnite location? Mine is Tilted Toers. 😂
If you have sex and your African parents find out,
“You can do the boom boom. But you can not do the boom boom in my house. Do it somewhere else."
So a girl says to her ex, "I can't get you out of my mind, the boyfriend I knew." The girl replies, "I see you in everything, like when I'm walking down the street, even at work, like trash cans are everywhere."
Where did Stephen Hawking go after he died?
FNAF Sister Location.
Q: Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to the countryside?
A: There’s no signal.
What does your mum and Istanbul have in common?
They are all insane comebacks!!!