Line jokes
Do you love water?
Then you love 75% of me!
Are you a waterfall?
'Cause I'm falling for you.
Pickup line: Are you the internet? 'Cause I feel a connection.
You really can't call Stalin bad, just think about the kids that depression.
Roses are red, That's a tin can, You have no home, So get in the van!
Do you have a halo?
'Cause I can give it to you.
What did the hairdresser say to the power line?
"Want a power cut?"
Setting: Funeral Home
Customer: Yes, I was considering what would be the best option for cheap cremation, but I feel that's silly to ask.
Funeral Director: Oh! We do have these nice urns over here at a discounted 75 percent off.
Customer: Okay? What's the catch? That's almost 300 dollars off?
Funeral Director: I assure you these are top-of-the-line urns and will keep your loved ones' remains secure and dry.
Customer: Okay?
Funeral Director: Yep, these have only been used once, so it is absolutely worth the purchase.
By: MiniMemorials.com
Trump goes to a bar and sees Hillary Clinton. He goes up to her and says, "Buy me a drink." She replies angrily, "Get your own drinks. What kind of a man asks a woman to buy him a drink?" Trump responds, "The kind that will grab you by the p***y."
Are you a grave, 'cause I want you on me?
What is long and not hairy?
The conga line in the cancer department.
Are you a race car?
Cuz I’m tryna fuck.
A son asked his mom: "Why are the lines in the LGBTQ community flag straight?"
I smell ice a mile. Titanic, I want to iceberg.
Are you lightning?
Because you're McQueen.
A young, innocent little girl is playing hopscotch, and she says, "You step on a crack, you break your mama's back." Then she steps on a crack, so her mother's back proceeded to break slowly. Then she said, "You step on a line, you break your dada's spine," but the neighbor's spine broke, and in happiness, the thought-to-be previous father gets in his car and drives through the garage door...
Girl playing outside: "Step on a line and you break your mommy's spine." She then steps on a line and her mother keels over screaming.
Girl playing outside: "Step on a crack and you break daddy's back." She steps on a crack the mailman next door then keels over screaming.
The husband starts celebrating, gets in the car, and starts to drive away.
The son comes outside and steps on a crack.
The dad then dies in a car crash.
S, ss, slalom. A.
What’s ten feet long and bald?
The conga line in the cancer ward.
From your Dad.
I won’t be back for a while, it’s a very long line.