Like jokes
Me: I found a group of furries in the woods.
Voice in back: Well, it looks like we're going huntin'.
My dad’s nickname for me is ‘Tiger’.
Now, my wrists look like a tiger.
Once my friend was saying something dumb, and I was like, "I Campbell-eve you just said that."
Visiting Alabama? Pop-up dating ads be like: "Never be lonely at cousinsonly.com."
The Twin Towers are like Angry Birds in real life.
Why do Emos love Christmas? So they can pretend they're ornaments and hang themselves on trees. Hope you liked it, happy holidays!
when someone says to cheer up: you, I never thought of that. :)
-> in reality, :( (sob)
depression is no game, and here in this world, we are here for each other, although at times it might not seem like it.
Keep strong, and you'll find the end of the tunnel, but ending the pain and being gone just spreads depression.
Like if you love food!
Trying to make a baby talk is like trying to negotiate with North Korea.
In my free time, I like to help blind people.
Verb, not adjective.
Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?
He has no legs...
Your forehead is so big and shiny it looks like a solar field.
Why did Johnny not like the audiobook he got for his birthday?
Johnny was deaf.
This post will get no comments or likes.
Suicide is just freedom, life is just full of pain... Sometimes if you're gone maybe somebody might notice. Feels like life is a maze and the only way to leave is the exit. Nobody notices your pain, your suffering, and that you try your best though everyone notices your mistakes. Life just feels like everyone hates you. Life for me is just faking smiles, I'm not sure how everyone lives such a good life.
Alright, riddle me this: I am loud and obnoxious, I like music that rhymes. I'm a fraction of the population, but commit half the crimes! What am I?
I like Cheetos.
Who are the fastest readers in the world? The 9/11 terrorists went through like 78 stories in 7 seconds.
An orphan is like marriage. The kid is always the reason for divorce. The kid is always the reason for his parents leaving him.
I like my dates like I like my wine...
Locked in a cellar and aged for 12 years.