Like jokes

Why do orphans like Minecraft? So they can build a home...

But a creeper blows it up.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Who.

Who who?

You sound like an owl.

Doctor, what is wrong with me?

You will never be able to walk again. It ain't like with me on the field it would make the Miami Dolphins any better.

Why does new pavement smell like butt?

In other words you can also call it asphalt.

Ass-phalt.

What instruments do skeletons like to play?

Trombones.

I like ramen. If you do, like!

A girl with no arms and one leg goes to her mother and asks: "Mom, next year for the carnival, can I dress up as a princess?"

The mother replies: "Why? Didn't you like the ice lolly dress from last year?"

Imagine you go to school, right? You hit the curve, the bus driver be like, "Ahhh, how do I stop the bus?" Students from the bus jump from the windows. One of the students: "That's a YOU problem."

I would like to tell you the name of a song I showed to my friend who had an overdose of LSD.

I see a dreamer.

Hi guys, I'm back! So I have a question for you. What is red and smells like blue paint? Type in comments what you came up with.

Is it just me, or everybody has a dark side, like a psycho side, and then you act like crazy for some reason?

Why do orphans like going to church?

Because they actually get to say "father" for once.

Jokes are like food, not everyone has it.

What hairstyle do horses like best while reading a story?

Pony-tails.

I'd tell a science joke, but I was like, "Nah, it would get no reaction."

They told me Avengers: Endgame was going to be 3 hours long, but honestly? I felt like it was over in a SNAP!

My friend is so short, whenever I dance with her, it’s like dancing with a golf tee.

What do you call a cow that no one likes? The mooser.

Patient: Doctor, I feel like a needle.

Doctor: I see your point!

The 1645 service has been cancelled and has been replaced by a replacement bus service.

EasyJet would like to apologise to all of those who are travelling to Greece.