Like jokes
Bro, are you an Oompa Loompa? Because you look like you just came from the chocolate factory.
Did you know that chips taste like the baked potato in things called bags of chips?
Anakin Skywalker: I don't like sand.
*also him*
Anakin Skywalker: I lived on sand.
Women be like chivalry is dead, then don't say thank you when you open the door for them.
Why do orphans not like laptops?...
They don't have a homepage.
You're built like a double cheeseburger.
I bet you like men!
What do orphans like to watch? Spider-Man: Homecoming.
Why do orphans like Minecraft? So they can build a home...
But a creeper blows it up.
Why do orphans not like Family Guy? Because they have family.
What do you call a deaf dog? As you like, he doesn't hear you anyway.
A guy walks into a restaurant and orders turtle soup. The waiter hollers, "One turtle soup!"
A moment later, the guy calls the waiter over and says, "I’ve changed my mind, I would like pea soup." The waiter hollers, "Hold the turtle, and make it pea!"
I am like mushrooms. Nobody likes me, but everybody tolerates me.
My friend is so short, whenever I dance with her, it’s like dancing with a golf tee.
Deals is bully, right? Denise, like a bully type of rock, is a piggy.
What grade is the worst, like if in elementary?
Why does Tesco like midgets?
Every little helps.
Your hairline is so discombobulated, it looks like a geometrical shape.
Why does Aaron like men? Because his dad beats him.
Michael J. Fox walks into an ice cream parlor.
The man behind the counter asks Michael, "Can I help you?"
Michael exclaims, "I would like an ice cream."
The man behind the counter asks, "What flavor?"
Michael says, "It doesn't matter what flavor, I'm gonna fucken drop it anyway."