Like Jokes

You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. -- If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

I have a joke about time travel, but I'm not gonna share it. You guys didn't like it.

so i was sitting on the couch with a woman,and i asked her,does this napkin smell like chloroform?

I was in school yesterday and I saw this emo kid with a new cut so I said, "I like ya cut g." And I slapped him. I don't know why I got in so much trouble. All I did was slap his wrist.

9/11 was like the 4th of july. It was very bright in the skies

I don’t like making jokes about 9/11, my grandad died in it, he was the greatest pilot I ever knew

How do emos propose

Would you like to join my family tree

The twin towers are like my parents, only one came back.

Why are most firefighters men? Because they like to find hot places and leave them wet.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Now that Stephen Hawking is dead the jokes will start to roll in just like he used to.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

A Blonde walks into a hospital claiming that everywhere she touches hurts. So she goes into the examination room and the doctor says "Okay I'd like you to point to wherever it hurts". So the Blonde pokes her cheek and says "Here. Ow." She then pokes her arm and says "Here. Ow." She then repeats this with different parts of her body until the doctor finally says that she should stop. The doctor say "I know what's happened to you." "What's happened to me??" The Blonde says, concerned. The doctor simply replies, "You have a broken finger."

"I'm not sure why my girlfriend's father doesn't like me."

"What was your first impression on him?"

"I told him, she calls me daddy too."

why do people like dating us emo girls? because of the texture on our thighs

Me having a good day Going on a walk on a peaceful day* my depression: hey whats up! Me: go away. My depression: well how rude. Me: 🙄. My depression: remeber that one tim...... Me: no, dont even. My depression: that we..... Me: nope. My deprssion: *says really fast*:said that one stupid joke that wasnt funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilt water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like yoy do every single night. Me: 😳😶😟. My depression: 😉 dont worry I'll always be here for you.