Why do a woman like to have sex with the lights off?
They can't stand to see a man have a good time.
Like Jokes
I like my wife like I like my coffee: so sweet, it gives me headaches.
What did Cinderella do when she got the ball?
She gagged and took it like a champ.
A guy starts chatting to a pretty woman at a party.
Seeing that she didn't back off, he asked her name. "Carmen," she replied. "That's a nice name," he said, warming up the conversation. "Who named you, your mother?"
"No, I named myself," she answered.
"Oh, that's interesting. Why Carmen?"
"Because I like cars, and I like men," she said, looking directly into his eyes. "So what's your name?" she asked.
‘BJ Titsngolf’
What do emo kids like to do in their spare time?
Hanging out.
Kids when they meet a kid out of home alone be like: “At least your mom came back!”
What happens at the orphanage be like:
The orphans: “HE IS THE MESSIAH!”
Do you like Wendy's? When deez nutz are in your mouth.
Do you like pudding? Pudding deez nuts in your mouth!
Wife: “I want another baby.”
Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one!”
Hey, look, it's that "TRAINS gender" guy. He says, "I like trains." Uh oh!
The cannibal says to the other cannibal, "I like it when humans fall from the sky because then they are meateor."
This joke's short just like Joe Biden's penis.
Oh wait, if I were to make a joke to the size of Joe Biden's penis, I wouldn't write a joke.
How to complement a depressed person: "I like your cuts, g."
Why do orphans love Home Alone?
They like to see a familiar picture.
I like trains.
*train hits him*
Dark jokes are like a new day. Suicidal people don't get it.
It's Christmas morning, and all the decorations are done, but the tree looks like it's missing something. *grabs the noose*
When you think you're depressed, but you know you're probably just using depression to be lazy and self-loathing, but then you realize that it, in itself, might actually be a symptom of depression.
Well gang, it looks like we've got another mystery on our hands!
Bro, my friend told me all his humor is dead and dry, and I was like, "Just like 9/11 victims."
