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Me after Taco Bell, "I’m about to blow this place up like September 11."
What weighs 70 pounds and doesn't like sex?
The 6-year-old in the trunk of my car.
Thomas Jefferson’s 80th b-day bash be like:
Jackson: "CALHOUN! YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME - IN BED WITH THE CONSTITUTION??"
The day I saw people asking Lebron James whether he liked to play basketball, my thoughts be like: wait, so Lebron James is gay cuz he likes to play with them balls.
Why does Aaron like men? Because his dad beats him.
Nepali people are so fucking racist, like I want them all to be extinct.
Bill really said "your body, my choice," like, my man, it's your body, MY choice.
There is no "W" in the word "Africa," just like there is no water.
If the sun had a kid, it would be like father, like sun. 🤓 😎
I hop on Clash Royale. I see Mega Knight. I cry.
Like if you hate the Mega Knight from Clash Royale because I really, really hate it so much!
By day I like girls, by night I like boys, but you, I wouldn’t like you at dusk or dawn.
What do girl emos and boy emos have in common?
1. They both want to die.
2. They both cut to die faster.
3. They both listen to emo songs.
4. They like "I wanna die" song/"Miss wanna die."
After long consideration, I've decided to get a zebra tattoo on my wrist. Not like anyone will notice the difference.
Bro, you can't talk; you look like the dwarf from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
Why did the cow knock over Johnny?
Because the cow felt like to dumb.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Your ass is clean because Randy won’t stop liking [it].
Ol' Mate Shane Warne has sadly passed away. He was probably Australia's Greatest Ever Cricketer. RIP Ol' Mate Warney, died doing what you loved, having gay sex with men and doing cocaine! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Like if you RIP Shane Warne 🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺
I'm afraid for my gay calendar. Its days are numbered!
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What does the Gay Garlic do when it gets hot? It takes it's CLOVES off. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Like if you LOL every time 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
There were 3 Gay Fish in a Tank. One says to the others: "How do you drive this thing?"
Like this joke if you LOLed! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣