Lifestyle jokes
Who left him hanging?
Why was the emo jealous of the orange?
It came precut.
Who can jump the highest?
Emos, some of them are still falling.
Met the emo kid today; he was pretty chill; he was just hanging out.
Ask the emo kid: "Hey, how's it hanging?"
Hang in there, ya emo bastards! Remember, you could always be dead. Oh, too soon?
No wonder they wanna die so much. I'd wanna die too if I was a freak who listens to Black Veil Brides!
Anybody got a knife? I mean, an emo dildo?
What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!
I wish my grass was emo, it would cut itself.
What do ya call a group of emo kids hanging from a tree? Ornaments.
There is gonna be a huge party at the orphanage tonight because the parents ain't home.
I am a God. Na, na, na, na, na, na. Yeah.
She's got makeup by the mirror in her bedroom, Thigh-high fishnets and some black boots, Nose pierced with the cigarette perfume, Half dead, but she still looks so cute. She is a monster in disguise, And she knows all the words to the trap songs, Takes pic's with a cherry-red lipstick, Says she only dates guys with a big..., mmm
You're so poor, you use the same toilet paper every time you take a poop!
An emo tried to high-five a tree.
It left him hanging.
Why are skinny people skinny?
Because he don't have a family to breastfeed on.
Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.
What's the difference between a gamer and dog poop?
Dog poop touches grass.
I don't blame Amber Heard for wanting Elon Musk, especially if Johnny Depp is hairy and smells like a port-o-potty full of cigarettes and gunsmoke.
What’s the only reason Emos drink?
To get hungover.
How do you know Johnny Depp finished his meal?
When you see fifty empty bottles of wine on his front doorstep.
Go on the quintillionaire morning routine now!
1. Wake up. 2. Take a shit. 3. Eat. 4. Get out of bed. 5. Have breakfast.