Life jokes
Why can't depressed people make depression jokes? Because they can't talk if they are dead.
Dad: Johnny, Johnny?
Johnny: Yes, Papa.
Dad: Getting women?
Johnny: Yes, Papa.
Dad: Telling lies?
Johnny: No, Papa.
Dad: Well, you're 100% lying because you get NO WOMEN!
You know it’s called the circle of life? Because there’s no point to it.
Life lesson guys:
Remember, being healthy is basically dying as slowly as possible.
Life is like a bag of jellybeans.
Nobody likes the black ones.
An orphan goes up to someone. The guy says, "Where are your parents?"
The orphan says, "Why do you think I'm wearing ripped pyjamas?"
You're so poor. You're just PO, you can't even afford the other O and R.
This is not a joke, it's a warning!
You guys are stupid. I am an orphan, and you better stop doing these. BTW, if you are an orphan, put it in the comments and say that it's not funny!
Roses are red,
romance is dead,
every day I suffer from existential dread.
Life's a bitch, and then you die. I now see what they mean.
Dark jokes are like a new day. Suicidal people don't get it.
Oliver Tree just died in a helicopter crash?
He doesn't have to worry about that because, according to him, life goes onionionionionionionionionionion.
Orphan: Can I go outside?
Coworker at orphanage: Go ask your mom.
Orphan: WAWAWAWAWAW
Kobe ended so many games with threes. Now he ends his life with trees.
This is the song we all misunderstood: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2S0QhGGO1gQ
"He said, "One day, you'll leave this world behind, so live a life you will remember." My father told me when I was just a child, "These are the nights that never die." My father told me."
Whenever I think about it deeply, it makes me wanna cry :(
When you think you can’t fail anymore if you’re dead, then you fail at suiciding.
Don't worry if you think your life sucks. Just remember that people are arguing over the gender of a potato head.
Dad: Come on, David, go dress up like a girl.
David: Isn't that illegal?
Dad: Nah, it isn't illegal if you keep the buttons in.
David: I hate my life.
A depressed kid didn't succeed at suicide and said, "I'm a failure at suicide, too."
Have a great day today!