Licking Jokes

yo mama so poor that when she went kfc she had to lick other peoples fingers

Your hairline is like a lollipop because every time someone licks it it gets shorter

Pussys and tits have one thing in common they both made for kids but men end up licking them or suckling them

What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period? One’s finger-licking good and the other is just a fast food restaurant.

I made this game called ligma say it ''ligma'' lick ma balls

You so poor you lick post cards for food

I pooped in a bottle and stuck my finger through it. I took some of the boo boo out licked it and and rubbed it on a wall making a BOO BOO portal. I jumped into it and i saw BOO BOO LAND. I rolled all in the chunk poop and drank the diarrhea.

What’s the most annoying thing about licking bald pussy?

Putting the damn nappy back on afterwards...

Mmmmmmmm daddy fck me harder i love you daddy mmmm i luv your cock mmmm lick me lick my clit daddy

today i saw my son lick out a tub of butter, i told him to make a sandwitch without butter for a week (as a punishment) he said 'ok' and licked the bread. 'it's really easy to spread' he said. LOL!

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lick-a-lotta-puss

What do lovely men and tampons have in common both lick up the juices of the women they were made for.

My friend has ligma...

LICK MA BALLS

Why did the mop lick the floor of the bathroom. Because it was so poopy.

A man decides on a day that it is time to buy a pet. He goes to the pet store, looks around and sees a beautiful parrot, sitting quietly on a stick in his cage. Yet the beast has no feet and paws. "What is the matter with you?" the man thinks aloud. "Well, that's how I was born, I'm actually a faulty parrot" says the bird. "Haha," the man laughs, "it seems like that parrot understands what I'm saying and even answers!" "I understand everything you say, I am extremely intelligent and very well educated," says the bird. "Well, if you're so smart then tell me how you can stay on your stick without legs." "Well," says the parrot, "it's a bit embarrassing, but okay, I wrap my little parrot penis around the stick, like a hook, but I hide that with my thick feathers." "Wow, you really understand everything I say, do not you?" "Yes, yes," replies the bird, "and I speak Spanish and English fluently, I can speak on a level about almost everything, politics, religion, sport and philosophy and I specialize in bird science, you should buy me, I am also a very good friend for you. " The man looks at the price tag, 200 euros is on it. "Sorry, I can not afford that." "Psst," whispers the parrot as he beckons the man with his wing closer. "Nobody wants me because I do not have legs, just bid 25 euros and you can take me with you." The man offers 25 euros and walks 5 minutes later with the parrot out of the store. A few weeks pass. The parrot is sensational. He is fun and interesting, gives good advice, is sympathetic to everyone, in short; the perfect roommate and friend. One day the man comes home from work and the parrot says "Pssssssssssst" while he beckons his wing again. The man comes close to the cage. "I do not know if I should tell you this," says the parrot, "but it's about your wife and the postman." "What!?" says the man. "Well, the postman came to the door and your wife greeted him in a nothing disguised nightgown and kissed him flat on the mouth." "And then," the man hisses, "What happened then?" "Well, the postman came in, grabbed her nightgown and started caressing her everywhere." "My God," says the now furious man, "And what else did they do?" "Then he took off her nightgown, went through his knees and started to lick her everywhere, starting at her breasts and getting further and further down." "And then, what happened, what else did they do?" the man screams . "No idea," says the papgaai, "I got a boner and thundered off my stick ..."

WOULD YOU RATHER: Fight Mike Tyson Or Lick an Elephants butt after it took a crap with diarrhea?

Me and my mom order Chinese food. My mom grab the egg roll, and start licking it up and down, and sucking on it in from of the Chinese delivery. I said why are you doing that for. Then my mom I love him a long time so we don't have to pay for the food.