Law jokes
What type of file do you need to turn a 14 centimeter hole into a 40 centimeter hole?
A pedophile.
I find it best to screw people with memory loss. I mean, what's my grandma gonna do? Describe me to the cops?
I'd hit you, but if I did, I'd go to jail for animal abuse.
What did Saskia say to Brandon?
Saskia: "Can you rape me like you did Sydney?"
What's the difference between a gun and a penis?
The American government does not define you as having the constitutional right to a penis.
Why didn't Michael Jackson get away with messaging with kids? Because they were all juveniles.
Why can't an orphan get caught on the hub? They have no parents to catch them.
I saw some terrorists on Family Feud. It looked like they had three strikes!
You know you have a domestic abuse problem when you beat your dick.
When is a rape victim right?
When she admits she lied.
In the Middle Ages it was illegal for a blind man to become a king.
I mean, I don't see why not.
I was arrested for eating too much crack on accident. How?
My sister came into my room shoving her ass in my face.
Why did the rapper go to school?
To improve his rap sheet!
Why do orphans play GTA?
So they can get wanted.
What was the guitar teacher arrested for? Stringing a minor.
What do you call an empty police station?
Banana Chicken.
What's the best way to get a man to confess to a rape?
Ask him to tell a rape joke.
I went to my local shooting range today but was surprised to see that the news reported a school shooting there. I still don't know who snitched...
A fine is a tax for doing something wrong. A tax is a fine for doing something good.
What happened to the man who made too many bad jokes? He served out a cruel and unusual PUNishment.