Laugh jokes

What’s a lung’s favorite type of exercise?

Breathing exercises.

I told this to my English teacher, and he said it to the class, and no one laughed. Someone help!

Your hairline so far back.

Even LeBron James had a good laugh!

What did the cops say when someone called him racist?

"How can I be racist? My wife's eye is black."

Roses are red, Your blood is too. You look like a monkey and belong in a zoo.

Do not worry, I will be there too, Not in a cage but laughing at you!

Three Europeans head to an island. They are captured by the island people. They are going to kill them, and they plead. They grant them a chance to live. The island people tell them to grab a fruit from the tribe's garden and bring it back, then to follow the task at hand.

The first guy brings back a peach. The island leader says, "Stick it up your ass. If you laugh, you die." The first guy shoves it up his ass and laughs, so they kill him. The second guy brings a grape, he does the same and laughs, making them kill him.

The first two are in heaven together. "Peaches are fuzzy, so I laughed. How the hell did you die? You had a grape!" says the first guy. The second guy replied, "It didn't tickle at all. I laughed at the sight [of] the third guy was bringing over a pineapple."

Q: Why didn't the skeleton laugh at the joke?

A: He broke his funny bone!

Me: I used to laugh at Skyrim jokes like you, then I took an...

Everyone Else: DON'T...FUCKING...SAY IT.

How does an octopus laugh? Buble buble.

Mississippi girls are missing a "pp."

I was trying to make friends, and this one person came up to me. They said, "Lettuce be friends?" I just laughed and said that was tear-able.

Scrolled through all of them, still haven't laughed.

These people who are offended by rape jokes don’t even understand humor. They think of humor as like a happy thing because humor makes us laugh and laughter makes us happy, but most of the jokes that we laugh at are filled with pain and suffering. If I take a joke like, how many police officers does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just beat the room for being black. Now that joke isn’t making light of the fact that people have marched in the civil rights movement and people have been racially discriminated against. It’s not making light of those, what it’s doing is it’s taking that pain and suffering and making you transcend it for a moment, and showing the absurdity of the human mind, and that is important. Humor at its best takes the bad things in this world that are painful and hard to deal with and makes it something funny.

And before you go in the comments and say I agree with rape, I don’t. I hope everybody who rapes someone to have their dick cut off. My little sister got fucking raped when she was six, and the guy is lucky he got caught by the police and not me, cause if I caught I would have fucking killed him, so I don’t agree with rape, but I still think rape jokes should still not be taken so seriously!

"Don't sneeze!"

Every time I was in the bathroom with my friends, I would always tell them, "Don't sneeze!" and when I did, they just laughed so hard. And when we sneezed, we laughed even harder.

Also,

"It dangles and swung!"

Language art quizzes are the best.

Ahaha, I'm laughing because my friend is so black his mama killed the clown.

"Jiggle balls, jiggle balls, jiggle all the way."

"Dr. Squatch will heal the itch, and know it goes away, hey!"

A blonde drops off her dress to the dry cleaners.

“Come again!” says the woman behind the desk.

“No, it’s curry this time.”

You got the whole crowd of people laughing when looking at you.

That face needing some laughing pills.

What does lmao mean? Laughing miles.

One day a teacher says: "What does a pig give us?"

A student says: "Bacon!"

The teacher says: "Good! Now, what does a chicken give us?"

A student says: "Eggs!"

The teacher says: "Good! Now, what does a fat cow give us?"

A student says: "Homework!"

The whole class laughs.

Who wants to laugh about life with me?