Last time I got a piece of ass was when my finger went through the toilet paper.
8008135 is my favorite number.
The worst ratio is 6:9.
And last but not least, "Why was six afraid of seven?" Seven eight nine. But why was six with nine? Because when you put them together, you get 69. But why was six mad at nine? Because Nine eight six, too.
I can barely remember the last words my uncle told me.
"Let go of my nose!"
Ok guys, I have one last joke (for now).
What do you call it when Panera is over?
Panera end.
My first name is Al and my last name is Coholic :) #yuengling.f/wat
Why do emo kids love dressing up on Halloween so much?
It's their last holiday for them, but at least they're still hanging on...
I was playing Warzone last night, and I shot my teammate that said they were emo. When I shot him, another player did, and it said "assist kill."
I don't know an orphan joke, but I bib cried last night.
Because I am an orphan.
I will never forget my grandfather's last words:
"Can you hold the ladder correctly, damn it!"
My last 15 minutes as a 23 y/o!!
It's not my birthday, but a scary-looking man with a crowbar just broke into my house.
Famous last words: I COULD EAT THIS IN ONE BITE!
Why does Japan not allow little boys to run?
Because the last time a little boy came, Japan lost a state.
I’ll never forget my father’s last words to me just before he died: “Are you sure you fixed the brakes?”
Why are people in Japan so thin?
Because it didn't end well the last time a Fat Man was there.
I went scuba diving last year. It was fun, but at the end, I ran out of oxygen.
It was a breathtaking experience.
Quote of the day: It's never too late to be what you wished you were.
Hope y'all are having a great day! I just got back from a volleyball tournament that I had to be up at 5 AM for! We played three games and won the last one. We advanced and are playing a few more tomorrow. Wish me and my team good luck!
Hello, I am School Shooter Memes. For the last month I made School Shooter Jokes on the site, so now I want you guys to vote for the best one. It will be in a quarterfinal format with the 8 of them being the most liked. I will link all of the polls in the comments so make sure to vote for your favourite joke.
Grandfather's last words: "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"
Grandmother's last words: "You know how to use that hammer."
Dad's last words: "Always aim before you shoot that gun."
Mom's last words: "Turn off the stove when you're done."
My last thought: Am I a murderer?
Grandpa's last words: "Why do you have a chainsaw?"
What did Ron put in his diary?
I "Her-mio-ne" after I banged her last night.
