Last jokes
What's the only thing that doesn't change in Alabama?
The last names after marriage!
I found Jeffrey Epstein’s diary the other day.
The last entry was about 12 years old.
What did the Titanic say while sinking?
"It's going down."
why are people in japan so slim? because the last time a fatman came, they lost half their population.
My dad died the other day, but I was able to hear his last words: "Son, are you still holding the ladder?"
I remember my son's last words: "I stubbed my toe!"
My Indian wife said last night if her fanny would taste like vindaloo curry, I said I've smelt your fucking armpits, you've got no chance.
Bank owner: If you want to start a bank account, I need your name.
Guy: Robin
Bank owner: Your last name?
Guy: Debank
Bank owner: Robin Debank?
Guy: Put your hands up and give me all the money!
The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, "Honey put down the knife, we were only talking about getting a divorce."
If I were to not eat the last biscuit, I would feel "crumby."
I have to file a complaint against Spotify because I didn’t see you on my hot singles last week.
I’ll never forget my dad’s last words. “Erase my search history, son.”
Why did the Orphan have imaginary parents?
Because his last parents existed.
I'll never forget my boss's last words: "We shall serve the best meat in our burgers!"
A man was asked by his 21 years old daughter, "Dad, how do you give a blowjob to a man that has a big dick?"
Her father replied, "Honey, you should have watched me last night. It was inside my mouth. Does it cycle now?"
Imagine if a disabled person's last name was Runner or Walker! 😬😂
I still remember my dad's last words, "You c***! You let the ladder go, you cuuunt!"
Smack! He hit the ground and bled out.
Last words of the captain of the Titanic... "Where's all this water come from?"
I will remember my auntie's last words: "If you shoot me, your p-nis is small!"
(gun shot)
A guy stole my car last night. Before dialing 911 I thought, "Fuck it. Let him explain the dead bodies in the trunk."