Last will jokes

What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits the windshield of a car going 80 mph? Its butt.

I shouted at a kid. I told him to get his parents.

It was the last time I worked at an orphanage, 🤣.

Life's like a box of chocolates. Doesn't last long for fat people.

Imagine if a disabled person's last name was Runner or Walker! 😬😂

Hillary Clinton lost last time to the first African American president, Barack Obama. Why will she lose this one to Donald Trump?

Because orange is the new black.

Gen Z is most likely going to be the last generation who felt the pain of getting up early to catch their favorite show.

I remember last year all these bitches called me lame so I stopped the simping and pretended I was gay, now I think they're all fucking with me.

I'm an LGBTQ imposter got cut last year know I've made the roster and you may think I'm a monster. I'm just just tryna see some titties.

If I could make someone tell me their last words, they'd say, "Make me."

My friend fell on the Nile river and Egypt last week.

He swears by it, but he’s in denial.

I found Jeffrey Epstein’s diary the other day.

The last entry was about 12 years old.

What was the last thing to go through the minds of 9/11 jumpers?

Their ankles.

Did you hear? There is a new toy for boys ages 2-10. It's called Jackson. A tiny white doll, with black Jackson. Get it while supplies last.

Q. What's the best part of living in Alabama?

A. Not having to change your last name when you get married.

A priest asks a convicted murderer on the electric chair, "Do you have any last request?"

"Yes," said the murderer, "Will you hold my hand?"

What did the orphan say to his dad last?

Please get non-fat milk!

I come in from work to see my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of a dick fuck does that!

I'll never forget my dad's last words before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, look how far I can kick this bucket!"

Child: Hello, I can’t find my dad.

Stranger: Oh, well when and where did you last see him?

Child: Oh, I remember, 5 years ago he went to get some milk here.

I still remember my dad's last words: "Don't worry son, Allah will be pleased."

Kurt Cobain's last job was a blow job. He blew his head clean off.