Language jokes
I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, and they got excited and asked if I could drive a B-52.
Wanna hear a couple of short jokes and a long joke?
Joke,
Joke,
Jooooooooooooooke.
Mary: If you born pikin (child) inside shop, wetin you go call that pikin (child)?
Mike: The pikin (child) go bear Bishop.
Roses are red, violets are violet. I mean, come on, it's literally in the name!
How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."
Memes
What's the smartest insect? A spelling bee!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Abby.
Abby who?
Abby C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z.
"My name is Dezz."
Knock, knock.
You suck my iron with you and mommy.
A guy told me, "Nothing rhymes with orange."
So I replied, "No, it doesn't."
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Leaf. “Leaf” who? Leaf my house, or else you will regret it. You don’t live here, you dumb idiot! ?!
How do you say "fish" without the "i"?
Fsh
What do you call a suspicious dog?
A sussy bark-er.
Are you Spanish, because I will say "Hola."
Do you go to a biblioteca? Also, in Spanish, you will never guess the word "biblioteca." Find it, I dare you.
What do you call a Spanish toilet?
Elton John.
Mohe?
Did you hear what happened to the Italian chef?
He pasta-way...
Knock knock. Who’s there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting c– MOO!
What does lmao mean? Laughing miles.
Me: What's the fifth month of the year?
Friend: May.
Me: May deez nuts fit in your mouth?