Language jokes
Eschew obfuscation.
My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.
What's the second to last letter in the alphabet? Y. Cause I wanted to know.
What does the F in "orphan" stand for?
"Family," but there is no F.
I told you ten puns to make you laugh, and I do not pun in-ten-did.
Wait a damn minute
Me and my friends were telling puns. My teacher said we should be “pun-ished.”
Let me tell you a pun. Never mind, it's tearable.
If you thought other people’s puns are bad, well, you should sea mine.
A pun walked into a room and killed ten people. Pun in, ten dead.
A single sentence walks into a bar.
Who’s there?
To.
To who?
No, “to whom.”
Why is "T" well-respected, but more in its lowercase form?
It crossed the line with Jesus.
You know what pun is used for "waist?"
Nothing. You'll find nothing.
It's just a waste of time.
Hey updog!
What's updog?
(Laughter)
Tell someone to say "alpha" and then "kenny one". Tell them to say it very fast. Tell them it sounded like they said, "I'll fuck anyone!"
How do you call a man with no body and no nose? Nobody knows.
What did the cow say when it wanted to go to the movies? -- "Let's go to the moovies!"
What did the sex offender frog say to the other sex offender frog when a hot frog passed them?
Rrrrrapeit!
What's only book rapeboat ever read? Rhyming dictionary, he got no rhymes without it.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange who?
Orange glad I didn’t say banana. Hahaha, you’re right, I hate that guy!