Why did everyone run from the Mexican when he went to the snack bar? He said "Oola snack bar!" Oola means hello in Spanish.
What did the Chinese man say to his wife?
I'll chin you later.
A woman ran into a police station screaming, "Help, I have been graped!" The policeman said, "Do you mean raped?" The woman said, "No, there was a bunch of them!"
Me: (Tim) What's wrong?
Him: Wha...
Me: Are you inTIMidated?
Jesus shows up and says you’ve got to go to church. You follow him in and under their breath it sounds like somebody says you steal and you say in your mind knowing you have before I’m sorry then somebody caughs and under their breath it sounds like they say again you steal so you whisper quietly I’m sorry... ...then somebody in German says shoot that son of a bitch
If someone who speaks two languages is bilingual, and someone who speaks many languages is multilingual, then what do you call someone who speaks one language?
An American.
(If it's unoriginal, I apologize. My friend gave me this joke.)
-Signed, AdmiralKizaru.
How many letters are in the English Alphabet? Twenty-Two. ET went home, P ran down his leg and he took ME with him.
A daughter asked her mother how to spell penis, her mom said you should have asked me last night it was at the tip of my tongue.
The general proofreading Hitler's speeches was the original Grammar Nazi
What do clams do on their birthday? They shell-brate, but they eat all the cake for themselves because they’re shellfish!
My cousin’s friend spelled “rasist” wrong and when my cousin showed me, the first thing I said to my cousin’s friend is “Go to Grammarly. They REALLY teach you spelling.”
What language do Gays speak?
HOMOGRAPHY maybe,,,
It’s important to establish a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.
me: the last time I used DUOLINGO was WHEN THE DINOSAURS WENT EXTINCT.
duolingo: lemme send my twins 2 go 2 ur houze (I got sideways8 twins)
you know, they didn't add the word "retard" into the dictionary for nothing
do u no 6+3 other person nine nein is no in german
It's amazing how many things ryme with blue.
Blue, sue, stew, poo, screw, new, boo, do, rue, glue, you, to, too, flew, you, goo, zoo, two, moo, woo, ooh, blew...
Words that have ho in them:
Thot Whore Asshole Horrible Horena (my ex gf)
What is the funniest hill in the world called? Hill-arious!
What did the spaghetti say to the sauce? Pasta la vista!
