Language jokes
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Owl say.
Owl say who?
Yes, they do.
No one wanted to hear my ocean puns, they said they were too fishy.
Did you hear the one about the deaf person?
Me: No.
That's because they can't hear, so they don't talk.
I recently saw a pun contest in NYC. The owners said there was a maximum of 10 puns that I could submit. I wrote 10 puns and submitted all of them in hopes that at least one would win--however, no pun in ten did.
What do you call a bulldog and a shih tzu? A bullshit.
What's a popular name in China? Curiosity, because curiosity killed the cat.
What is a penguin without a pen? A guin...
What do you call someone with one arm and no legs?
Names.
Who is Joe?
You reply back: Who is Candice?
They reply back: Who is Candice?
You say: "Candice nuts fit into Joe Mama's mouth."
A single sentence walks into a bar.
Spell "I cup..." "I see you pee!"
What are the 3 shortest words in the English language?
“Is It In?”
What do French ducks say?
Quoi quoi.
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows. No body, nose.
A Mexican magician says he will disappear on the count of three. He says, "uno, dos..." and poof! He disappears without a tres.
Spell "IOUT", no space.
I'm so lonely, even the alphabet says "Hi."
JK.
I tried a pun about water, but people "sea" right through it, and when people complain, they are usually just being a beach.
I entered ten puns in a joke contest to see which one would win.
No pun in ten did.
What do you call a girl with only one leg? Eileen.
What about an Asian girl with only one leg? Irene.